-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- On The Beach Copyright 1997 by Ellen Hayes. No part of this work may be distributed as an original work by another person or group. Permission is given to redistribute this by electronic means, as long as the entirety of the work is distributed, and credit is given to the original author, me. Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when used for satirical purposes. All rights reserved. Furthermore, This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and possibly sex. If you are legally not allowed to read materials containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading this. I am not responsible. Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish, state, and country. On The Beach After staring at the ceiling for a couple of hours, Andrea couldn't stand it any more. She slipped quietly out of bed, and grabbed her shorts and a T shirt. *Might as well wear a bathing suit,* Andrea thought, hearing thunder. *But they might think I was dumb enough to go swimming in the undertow, in the dark. Better not.* The mundane thoughts helped calm down the storm inside her. Her parents snored away in quiet sleep, unaware of anything besides their dreams. Andrea wished she was that lucky tonight. She quietly snuck out of the beachhouse and down to the water's edge. The waves were fierce tonight. So was the wind. It blew her hair towards the sea, towards freedom, towards mindlessness. *Why?* she thought. She'd never wanted to come down to the beachhouse, but her folks had a month off, and had wanted to play beach bums. They wouldn't let her out of it, either. She'd sulked the first couple of days, hating every moment of it, until she'd met Darlene. Darlene was in the same boat, dragged along on her family vacation. They had beachhouses a couple of houses apart. They'd met while walking on the beach, away from their respective families, and hit it off from the first. Things had been so normal when she'd first met Darlene. Except that Dar was a couple of years older than her. The difference in ages was normally so important at school, but for some reason it didn't matter between them. Dar had treated her a lot like a younger sister, and as a friend too. They'd talked about their schools, the people they knew, how they liked Galveston. The two of them had gone down the Strand so many times they had it memorized. They'd bought each other little things. Traded clothes and jewelry. Flirted together with the boys in town. The rain felt cold on her face. She tried to watch the drops in the dark, letting them splash into her eyes, her mouth, her hair. A kiss on the cheek was nothing. She'd done that with some of her own friends, back home. Hugs - well, you could hug almost anyone, couldn't you? And if it was cold, a warm arm across your shoulder was only the nice thing to do. Andrea turned and began to walk along, the storm-tossed waves rushing around her feet occasionally. The campfire they'd had half a week ago was when it had really gone to hell. That was when it had stepped over the line. Ironically, she'd been the one that had wanted it most. They'd taken food, a couple of blankets, a flashlight, and a couple of other things down the beach to one of the camping areas. It was pretty deserted, being a weekday. When they found that the small fire wasn't quite enough to keep them warm, Dar had suggested that they put their arms around each other. It had been safe, comforting, wonderful. Loving. When Darlene had moved her head to ask a question, Andrea had kissed her. Dar kissed her back. Then they had stared at each other. Dar had slowly bent down and kissed her on the lips. Andrea had responded with a physical passion she'd never known. She was running down the waterline in the dark, as the rain intensified. Running, panting, fighting the sand and the water and the wind. Pushing herself. They'd showed each other things that neither had ever known, things heard of in locker rooms or read secretively from adult magazines. Dar had confided shakily, as both of them rested, that she'd kissed a girl once before, but nothing more. Andrea had never kissed a friend like that. Regardless, they found themselves doing things to each other they'd never dreamt of. Or never admitted dreaming. When the sun had finally begun peeking over the horizon, they'd had just enough energy to pull sand-encrusted clothes on and drag their gear back to their respective houses. Andrea had slept all day long. A larger wave surged all the way up to her knees, causing her to stumble at the sudden resistance. She caught herself with her hands, but another wave crashed over her before she could get up. The wind was colder, now, and she was drenched. She stayed on her hands and knees, panting. "Why?" she asked the sand. The next night, Darlene had come over. They, rather she had talked about the campout, using unhappy words, painful words like "lesbian" and "relationship". And "love". That hurt the worst of them all. Andrea had screamed denial, wishing that nothing had ever happened. She didn't want to know, damnit! Didn't want to think about it. Didn't want anything at all to interfere. She knew how her life was going to be; she had it all planned out. College, job, husband, children, house, the works. Didn't want anything to change. She just wanted it the way it was. Like it was supposed to be. They'd ended up yelling, at the end. Andrea screamed that she'd been trapped, that Darlene had planned this all along. Darlene simply shrieked denial. Dar had been the first one to run away, sobbing. Andrea had gone the opposite direction, running until she could no longer hear either's cries. She got up, and walked further up the beach, shivering in the wind. The rain was pelting her now, almost colder than the salt water that had soaked her so thoroughly. "Why did this have to happen?" she asked the sky through half-open eyes. "It's too complicated." Sure, she'd enjoyed running around with Darlene. Enjoyed cuddling with her. Looking at her body - who wouldn't? She was so tan, and the daily swimming she did kept her just taut enough. "That doesn't make me a lesbian, does it? Any girl would have looked, liked what she saw. Anyone..." Darlene hadn't called for three days. Her parents had come out of their obliviousness to notice that something was wrong. Andrea said they'd had a fight. Too bad, her parents said. What a shame, and her being such a nice girl, too. "Nice, hah!" The worst part was the dreams. She'd never had such intense visions before, of Darlene holding her, of them living in the beachhouse forever, of taking her to prom, kissing, making love in the sand again, in the sea, on a bed of cotton sheets... "WHY DO I HAVE TO BE A LESBIAN??" Andrea screamed into the wind, her fists and arms and neck and legs and even toes all straining with the question. As if in answer, a bolt of lightning hit the ocean not far away, the flash and sound simultaneous and stunning. She sensed, rather than clearly saw, the shape next to her. She shrieked, turning to run, wondering how she could have been so stupid to be out here in a storm at two in the morning, instantly regretting everything. "ANDY!" screamed the voice that had haunted her mind for the last three days. She stopped in shock, turned around. She couldn't even see a face, just a hole in the darkness. Not that she needed to see. Darlene stepped closer, and shouted over the storm, "I don't want to be one either! It's nobody's fault! It just happened!" She took a ragged breath, and Andrea realized Dar was crying again. "I didn't want to hurt you, I just wanted to be with you... you were so nice... better than any friend I ever had..." Andrea had to get closer to understand what Dar was saying; she was speaking quieter and quieter. "I didn't... I never..." Andrea strained to hear the words until she realized that Dar had her head in her hands, was sobbing without speaking. Andrea wanted so badly to hold her, to comfort her, to tell her it would be alright, that all was forgiven. She stood there, her arms wrapped around herself, staring as Dar cried. Darlene finally looked up at Andrea, her breath heavy and thick. "I," she said, and choked, and collapsed to the wet sand. Andrea caught her as Dar began to cry again. Soon, very soon, she was crying herself, the pain that had been devouring her pouring itself out in waves, like the waves a few feet away. They held on to each other as the storm raged on. "M-maybe w-we d-don't-t have to be l-l-lesb-bians," stuttered Andrea in desperation, the words forced out by a power she didn't know was in her. "M-maybe we could just, just l-l-love each other..." Darlene stopped crying, she could feel it. Dar sat up, and put her sandy hands on Andrea's face. "What?" she whispered in disbelief. Andrea felt her breath running away as she spoke. "Maybe we could just l-l-love each other, like friends, whatever that is, like the campout, and everything. We don't have to be l-lesbians to l-l-l-care for each other, right?" She sniffed, then whispered, "I don't want to be a lesbian, I just want to be with you..." The world went to sparkles, and she felt everything twist, then Darlene's arms holding her steady. Holding her tight. Stroking her hair. Making everything right again. Darlene eventually led her to the waves, where they washed the sand off. And the tears. Andrea was the first to take off her sodden top, and soon they were both naked as they placed their clothes under some driftwood before running back to the water. The water caressed them as they made frantic love in the breaking seas, and the storm winds echoed their cries. "You can separate sex from teenage angst, but you can't separate angst from teenage sex." - ehayes "Tallyho!" \ / @>--,--'-- ehayes@nym.alias.net + vicki .sig Ellen Hayes -=(*)=(*)=- Renaissance Woman ==[-------- + virus 9.1a -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: 2.6.2 iQCVAwUBMyLY3XYDebnvyV1VAQGpxAP+OZWHY9Gn1BbAXz7XtuDQGPkXozzellz3 dp2kVUNHGVIjQWpCTj+Nx5V/KiXvjIfcOryqFhoWD7bmCrQmavfxC2PzFr3pQThV Wv38GMrlm4pQsRveB/AqzSvrO9gA0uVH/x5j5dL604F7v3F0k3D/doNj17VZ5Ytw UQwy6j6iGuY= =suV2 -----END PGP SIGNATURE-----