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Monster Tuck -*- Copyright 2007 by Ellen Hayes.

Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual
persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when
used for satirical purposes.

This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and
possibly sex.  If you are legally not allowed to read materials
containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading
this.  I am not responsible.
Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it
in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally
allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish,
state, and country.

All rights reserved.  See the bottom for distribution rights.


Monster Tuck


***
14:21 30 Oct

     "Yahh shit damnit..."  Having Debbie call me had rattled my nerves
more than I wanted to admit, or more than I wanted to have happen.  I
did NOT remember giving her my cellphone number either, which meant
someone HAD leaked it.  I wondered about getting Dad to give me a new
one, but I doubted he would if it was just Debbie calling on it.  "Shit,
shit shit shit..."

***
14:34 30 Oct

     As I debated whether or not to have a shower to warm up, I noticed
myself in the mirror.  I could SEE how thin I was.  "Man oh man oh
man..."

***
15:05 30 Oct

     "Did you get it?!  Did you get it!?"
     *Nice to see you too, rodent,* I sighed, but it was kind of
inevitable; I'd have been the same way.  "Just a moment, and then we'll
finish with the eye test," I told Ricky as I dug in my pack.
     "YESSS!" he triumphed.
     "Look at the red dot," I instructed as I fumbled in my purse for my
sunglasses and slid them on one-handed, then found the instrument and
turned it on and held it up.  He'd clenched his eyes shut and thrown his
hands up, as if that would protect him.  I touched the clicker at the
bottom, then said, "See? That wasn't so bad, was it?" before I took off
my sunglasses.
     "Lemmesee!  LEMMESEE!!"  He was grabbing for it, so I fended him
off with my arm.  "Ow!"
     "Well don't get grabby."

***
15:33 30 Oct

     Hangover, or Muggles or whatever, looked outside, without moving,
and then looked back at us like, 'What, you can't expect me to go out in
THAT?'
     "It's just cold!" I complained, and Ricky and Hangover both looked
over at me like I was the one going crazy and being unreasonable and
irrational.  "GO outside!" I ordered.  Ricky left, pulling the leash,
and the last thing I saw was Hangover giving me a look which said, 'This
is how it starts, you know, the madness-' before Ricky yanked him out.

***
15:45 30 Oct

     "Noooo!  It's stupid!"
     "Ricky, may I remind you that you owe me a LOT of money?"  He did
NOT like that.  "You OWE me, kid.  So finish your snack and then put
your coat on, 'cause we're going."  I had to know.  I didn't know why,
but I had to know.  It had been eating at me since Rachel's.  "Besides,
we can get you a better pair of sunglasses too, maybe."  I had gotten
SOMETHING in my last pay envelope... which I had with me.
     "We can?"
     "Yesss...  Maybe.  Depends on cost."  I thought I had it with me.
"Go put your coat back on and lemme check something..."

***
15:51 30 Oct

     "Look, just put the stuff in the back seat next to her.  The
trunk's full."  Too full to hold a stroller and a diaper bag the size of
a greatpack, anyway.
     "How're you gonna take it home if you get something?"
     "I'm not GETTING anything, Ricky..."  You'd think he'd have
listened the last four times I'd said exactly that.

***
16:14 30 Oct

     "I will be dipped..."  I cut that off before the dangerous part got
out, but just barely.
     Staring at myself in the big mirror, I had two conclusions.  Well,
three.  The first one was, that women's sizes were completely bullshit;
but I'd been told that.  The two that concerned me... one was, I was
down to a size six or so in tops and a FOUR in bottoms.  And the skirt
was loose over my hips, too, though it fit at the waist.  The other was,
the boobs I had on were WAY too big.  I looked like a petite porn model.

***
16:18 30 Oct

     "You're really not getting anything?"
     I sighed.  *Six...*  "I TOLD you I wasn't going to, Ricky..."
Though I'd been tempted; a seriously oversized sweater would be both
warm and concealing, and I could use both at the moment.  Not that I
could really afford one.
     "Well, what about sunglasses?"
     I sighed.

***
16:42 30 Oct

     "Uh oh..."
     "What?"
     'Your mom's home,' I didn't say.  "Nothing."
     "What?!"
     "Your mom's home, and we're not," I said.
     "But you left a note, right?"
     "Yeah..."  If she'd believe it.  At least he'd taken Hangover out
before we left.

***
16:47 30 Oct

     "Yeah, just the last little bit... Oh, here's the receipt," I said
as I finally found it again.  "I'd suggest keeping the sunglasses after
Halloween; they're good ones, and I got him a keeper lanyard."
     "A what?" Miz Parker asked.
     I pointed at my neck and said, "One of those things, cord, that
goes around the neck and keeps 'em from coming off."
     "Oh, right."
     "You can also safety pin the cord to his back collar if he's
wearing a shirt, or add another cord and do it to his bathing suit," I
mentioned.  Mom had become clever at attaching things to us kids, and
Dad.

***
16:58 30 Oct

     "See?  Isn't it cool?" Ricky insisted at us.
     "Oh yeah," I nodded, grinning where he couldn't see me.  *Finally a
use for a kid's three-piece suit,* I was thinking.
     Of course he didn't really look like either Tommy Lee Jones - no
wrinkles, no hair loss - or Will Smith - duh - but other than that, he
was a pretty good pint-sized version of a Man In Black.  Except his tie
was-
     "Hey Mom, let me give you the eye test," he said, trying to be
cunning.
     "Uh-uh, let me do your tie first... oh."  It was a clip-on, I
discovered.  "Not a real tie?"
     "He won't wear one," Miz Parker said the long way.  Ricky's
momentary choking and gagging was the short way.  "Ricky," she warned.
     "Do you have a real tie?" I asked Ricky.  "Just for the costume."

***
17:20 30 Oct

     Ricky had been banished temporarily, to remove his 'costume' in the
faint hope that it wouldn't get any dirtier or more wrinkled before
tomorrow.  I could've told her it was a faint hope... but maybe Ricky
WOULDN'T sleep in it.  Maybe.
     Hangover was staring at his food bowl like he knew nothing good
would happen there, but he was too depressed to do anything else.
     "Where did you get that eye thing?" Miz Parker asked.
     "Wh-  Oh, that."  I was glad for the distraction.  "Made it last
night."
     She laughed.
     "What?"
     "You made it?  Come on..." she said, like I was pushing the joke a
little too far after she'd caught it.
     "Yeah I made it," I said, getting a little irritated.  "We had the
parts in stock, and we happened to have a pushbutton switch that'd make
a little clicking noise."
     "You really made that thing?"
     "Yes!"
     "From, from-"
     "From electronic parts we had, yeah.  It's not hard; it took me
about thirty- well, about an hour, 'cause I had to epoxy some stuff and
then let that set and then do some sculpting work on it."  I'd had
plenty of time this morning, since I hadn't been wasting it sleeping,
haha.  "Speaking of time, how did Mister Parker deal with the Chinese
style food?"  I'd done that recently, I remembered.
     Her eyebrows went up and I felt a sinking feeling, but she said,
"Not too bad.  Ricky almost got grounded for teasing him, though.  David
does NOT like Ricky talking back."
     "Who does?" I said, thinking back to all the times when my wit had
been sorely underappreciated.  It seemed to take my parents several
years to realize I had a sense of humor.
     "Were you going to do something like that again?" she asked.
     I checked my watch.  "Well, I was kinda thinking that, but I guess
I could do something in a couple hours..."  I shook my head.  "Dunno
what I was thinking, really; I've got plenty of time."  I guessed I was
having to re-adapt to the schedule.
     "Do you have time to do something else?"
     "Huh?  Like, uh, like what?" I said, trying to be neutral about it
instead of combative.
     "Uh, well..."  I got suspicious.  Well, more.  "How long would it
take you to make cookies?  I was thinking, instead of candy for
Halloween..."
     "Well, it'd be cheaper to buy candy," I said from experience.
     "It would?"
     "Yeah... this isn't like for a school thing of Ricky's, is it?"
I'd learned not to sign Mom up for school things and then forget to
mention them until the day before.  Susan had been really instructional
in her own inadvertent way.
     Miz Parker's face flickered but she emphatically stated, "No.  I
ALMOST forgot, but not quite; that's all ready for him in the morning."
     "Okay...  Lemme think..."  I thought.  "Probably tomorrow afternoon
would be good; I don't really have the time to sit here baking
everything AND get supper finished tonight, 'cause I still have to pick
J- a friend up after her work at eight.  But I could do it tomorrow..."

***
18:11 30 Oct

     "They're cute!" Miz Parker insisted.
     "Well... yeah, okay," I lied, and smiled.  Holiday 'shaped' cookie
cutters were one of those degenerate things we'd never sunk to.  But I
had to be nice; she'd gone to the store, in the middle of post-work
grocery insanity, to buy enough cookie ingredients for me to bake my
fingers off so that I could take some with me when I left.  Well, a lot.

***
18:48 30 Oct

     "Baked chicken and a few other things, that Miz Parker said you
liked," I told Mister Parker.  I guess she'd been planning to 'make it
up to him' for the Chinese I'd inflicted on him earlier this week.  But
she'd said it was okay to use the stuff, since she'd gone to the store
to get cookie supplies and the inevitable 'a few other things'.
     He smiled and teased, "No weird stuff tonight?"
     I made a face and went, "Oh, you didn't want something unusual with
the chicken?  Uh..." but then I started laughing at the expressions on
his face.  "Hah!  Gotya!" I managed to get out coherently.  "AAAhahaha!"

***
20:12 30 Oct

     "Well, she wanted me to bake tomorrow, so that's like she wants to
keep me there, right?"
     "You're baking for HER?  And not for ME?  Fuck, I don't love you
any more," Jill said before laughing at me.
     "Fine, if you don't love me I won't bring you any," I smirked back
at her.
     She turned to face me, and I caught a glimpse of her eyes narrowed.
"I might love you... how many?"
     "How much would you love me for... two dozen?"
     She ran her fingers along my leg, and laughed again.  We both did.

***
20:14 30 Oct

     "Yeah, I mean, if you're baking," Jill agreed.  "SHE asked YOU,
right?"
     "Right."
     "Yah, she wants you there.  At least until you bake something," she
grinned again.
     "Godd-"
     "No, r-"
     "-amnit-"
     "-really, Val," Jill said rapidly, "she wants you there, or at
least she's trying to work on it or something.  I don't think she'd ask
you to do that, to bake something, if she was planning on getting rid of
you."
     "You think?"

***
20:28 30 Oct

     "Hey, no homework," Sabrina said as she smiled at me.
     "YOU didn't give me any homework," I corrected, and we grimaced at
each other.  "Thanks for all the work, though," I told her.  "I'm almost
caught up."
     "How's your costume?" Jill asked Sabrina.
     "I think I got it," Sabrina answered.  "Tuck, wh-  Oh, right," she
remembered as I shook my head.  "You're gonna look weird tomorrow," she
warned.
     "As opposed to the rest of the year?"
     She grinned at me, but it was sort of low energy.  "Tuck, could you
take Jill home tonight?  I need to get home early."
     "Costume?" Jill asked.
     "That, and I spent a lot LAST night working on it, and thinking
about it, and then I had to do some shopping today, so I wanna get some
sleep," she said.
     "Yeah, I can take her home...  Any idea when?" I asked Jill.
     "Christmas?" Jill suggested.
     "No," Dad said as Jill started to grin.
     "Aw, come on, Dad... think live-in maid."
     Dad's eyebrows went as he thought about the possibility, as Jill
squawked at me and hit my arm.
     "Gonna make her wear the petticoats and everything?" Sabrina
'helped'.
     "Sabrina!" Jill squeaked.

***
20:38 30 Oct

     "A size four?"
     "Swear ta gawd, that's what the label said," I told her.
     She squinted at me.  "I don't think you look THAT thin..."

***
20:40 30 Oct

     "Yah, okay."
     "Man, a four..."  I was still kind of stunned.  Pam was that
thin... then again, I'd known I was seriously underweight.
     "Don't tell Sabrina, she'll kill you.  And REALLY don't tell
Kim, sh-"
     "No, I KNEW that," I assured Jill.  "She'd have a fit, maybe two or
three.  What is it with her?"
     "She's overweight and hates it, duh," Jill stated.  "Hey, uh, Tuck?
Could you put your pants back on or something?"
     "H-  Oh, yeah, sure."  I started to bend down and winced.
     "Oh, sor-"  Jill shot up and dropped and handed me my pants.
     "Thanks," I told her, panting a little.  It still hurt sometimes
when I moved wrong, and I wasn't entirely sure what 'move wrong' was.
There seemed to be multiple instances of the class.  "And, man, I gotta
get smaller breast forms...  I looked like a porn star in the mirror."
     Jill laughed, and laughed, and laughed...
     When she slowed down, I asked, "What's so funny?"  I mean, the idea
of me in porn was kind of laughable, but I wasn't sure that's what she
was thinking.
     She shook her head, still grinning.  "Most girls want BIGGER
tits..."
     "Except," I predicted, "the ones that have them."  I'd been around
enough girls long enough to figure that one out.
     She nodded, looking half sour and half giggly.  "THEY want smaller
ones... but everyone else wants bigger ones."
     I caught the joke.  "And I get to pick my size..."
     She laughed.  So did I.

***
20:43 30 Oct

     "Depends on the bra," she said, and made a face.  "Of COURSE
they're all different, so of COURSE you can't tell if any actual bra is
going to fit well unless you try it on...  Kind of a B, pretty much,"
she summarized.
     "Yeah?"  They looked smaller when she had clothes on, but maybe
that was the clothes.  "Do you try to make 'em look smaller?  Most of
the time, I mean."
     "Huh?  Well, yeah, sometimes," she admitted.  "And, y'know, sports
bras make 'em smaller, look smaller."  That's what she was wearing now,
a gray one.  "Those aren't so bad with the sizing, 'cause of the
stretch."
     "So when would you wear something to make 'em look bigger?" I
asked.
     "Uh...  I dunno?  A date or something," she chuckled.
     "Not work?
     "No," she scorned.  "Why?  So customers'd try to pick me up?"
     "I dunno; s'why I asked.  Makes sense though."
     Pause.
     "So l-" "What-"
     "You first," I said before she could.
     "Uh, so, what, I mean, what size do you want?  Heheheh," she
snickered.
     "Um..."  This was kind of funny, actually.
     "'Gee, I dunno,'" she whined in imitation of a mallrat.  "'Can I
see something in a C cup?'"
     "Heheheheheh," I commented, then realized, "Oh shit, what if you
had different sizes for different occasions, an-"  She burst out over
that, but that wasn't the funny bit.  "And then you screwed up getting
dressed, like mismatched socks!"  THAT was funny.

***
21:04 30 Oct

     The knock on the door reminded us both simultaneously that we
weren't 'dressed for company' at the moment.
     After a scramble, we both had clothes on, so I opened the door.
     "Am I interrupting something?" Sabrina asked with a very bland
face.
     "Hah, no," I told her.
     "Just wanted to say goodnight."
     "Nine o'clock?"  I looked at my watch.  "Damn..."  It seemed like
it'd only been five or ten minutes.
     "See ya tomorrow?" she asked us.
     "Yeah."
     "Definitely," Jill nodded.  "Take care."
     "Yeah..."  She didn't leave.  "What WERE you two doing in there?"
     "Uh..."  I looked at Jill, and she was looking at me.  Then she
fell off the bed laughing, as she turned red.  "Uh..."
     Sabrina said rapidly, "Never mind, sorry I asked, have fun
g'night!" and grabbed the door handle and pushed me back in the room and
shut the door.
     "AHAhahahahah!" Jill gasped from the floor.
     "Shut up Jill," I snorted.

***
21:19 30 Oct

     "Yeah, I guess..."  Jill did not seem to relish the idea of going
home.  Which I could sort of understand, because I didn't really want to
take her at the moment either.
     "No, really," I forced.  "If I don't get you home soon, you'll be
staying here, 'cause I'm not gonna be safe to drive in a while, and I
gotta get BACK home after I take YOU home."
     She sighed, looking disgusted.  "I just...  I mean... ah, fuck,"
she sighed, and got up.
     "Well, maybe you could stay here tomorrow night," I said.
     She turned and looked at me.  "What?"
     I shrugged.  "One girl... I dunno.  I mean, I'm not going out
tomorrow night..."  For the first time in memory.

***
21:23 30 Oct

     "Tomorrow night?" Dad asked, as his eyebrows went up.
     "Yeah..."
     I looked at Jill, who was looking at the floor, her arms pulled
around her.  "I hate being home," Jill said, kind of muffled.
     "Ah, you were applying for the maid's job," Dad said, and when Jill
looked up he had a straight face going.
     "He's kidding," I predicted.  "No, Dad, just... I mean, just to
hang out.  Like Mike's done a lot."
     "Is Mike gonna be here?"
     I shrugged and looked at Jill.  She shrugged at me.

***
21:26 30 Oct

     "Well, Jill doesn't want to go home, so-"
     "So you want help throwing her out?" Mike guessed.
     "No!  Just, I mean, tomorrow night... you weren't going out
tomorrow, were you?"
     He sighed.  "No...  You're not going out.  Besides, my costume
sucks.  Not enough time..."  To really do it well, you needed to start
at the beginning of October.  Or, the beginning of November for next
year, buying stuff; but the work really started around the beginning of
October, for a decent one.
     We sighed.
     That was too depressing to contemplate, so I changed the subject.
"Anyway, so, Jill thought she could stay here one night, and I thought
maybe you..."  I shrugged, which did nothing for the phone.  "Was just a
thought."
     "This isn't some kind of weird girl thing is it?" Mike asked
skeptically.
     "Mike!  It's JILL," I emphasized.
     "Who's... no, never mind, you're right," which made me want to
argue the other way, to defend her; I mentally slapped myself several
times since my hands were occupied.  "Tell you tomorrow.  Go take her
home before you get unsafe to drive; you sound tired."
     I sighed.  "I know that..."
     "Tomorrow, then?  Ta, darling," and he hung up LONG before I could
process THAT.

***
22:06 30 Oct

     "So, anyway, see you tomorrow, right?"
     "Yep."  I yawned.  "Uh."
     Jill slapped the door, which woke me up slightly, and grinned, and
said, "Don't fall asleep on the way home!"
     "Yes Jill.  G'night Jill."

***
22:40 30 Oct

     "Dana said that if you're not having trouble tomorrow, you can go
off the liquid meds tomorrow night, and see how that goes," Dad said.
     "Awww..."  I'd been hoping for tonight.
     "Makes sense; if you have any problems, better over the weekend
than at school."
     "Wh-  Well, yeah, okay," I changed my mind.  I'd already been out
nearly a month; I didn't need to be out another day because I'd gone off
the meds too soon.
     "Did Mike say he was coming over tomorrow night?"
     "I told you, he said he'd tell me tomorrow..."
     "Ah, right.  Make an email," he reminded me.
     "Nnnnngh," I said.
     "Night, kid.  Get some sleep."
     "Yes Dad."

***
22:44 30 Oct

     "Get some sleep, you need it."
     "Yes Mom."  I gave her a hug, then went to my room to take some
really overdue meds.

***
01:43 31 Oct

     "Well, that sucked..."  I don't know where I'd gotten the Halloween
imagery, but this would've made a good movie that I would never have
paid money to see.  I hated being scared.  Especially this bad.
     "Damn..."  *Well, shit, if she sells it I get seventy-five
percent,* I remembered, and got up to go write the details down before
they faded.  If they'd fade.
     But it wouldn't work; nobody would understand the Debbie parts or
the Parker parts or the tits without me having to use most of the two
hours explaining it, and then it would turn from a horror film into some
sort of indie film-festival weird shit.  Which might actually be worse.
It certainly wouldn't make any money.

***
01:44 31 Oct

     "Oh, wait, it's Halloween.  Duh."  That's where THAT had come from.

***
06:00 31 Oct

     "What?"  I traced the noise to the other alarm I'd set.  "Oh,
right.  Damnit!"  I was really in the groove with the music, and I
didn't want to stop right now...  I started writing notes about where I
was, though, so I could pick up again Friday night.  At least I'd
managed to get my English paper done before I started, though I hated
wasting the time on it.  Music was a lot better, and it'd last a lot
longer; nobody gave a damn about English papers after they were graded,
except the kids who had the class next year.

***
06:17 31 Oct

     "Oh, no, Jill's coming," I remembered.  I doubted she'd want to sit
around and watch me play with sound files and mixers and things.  Mike
didn't, unless I was letting him suggest stuff, which sometimes worked
and sometimes didn't.  In any case, it was a lot less likely I'd get
anything done until she went home.  And I had therapy too, Saturday
morning.  "Damnit."
     If I hadn't known better, I'd have been terribly afraid at the
concept of being an adult, since being a teenager was so hard.  On the
other hand, I knew better; adults had less obligations and more tools to
meet them with, two of them being 'decently paid employment' and
'legally adult'.

***
06:55 31 Oct

     "You didn't do shit, did you?"
     "Well, no," I admitted, since it was plainly obvious.  Jill was
wearing more makeup than I thought she owned, and it looked decent on
her.  Her teeth weren't really good, though; but I wasn't going to say
that.  "You look good, though."  I had a vague urge to beat the shit out
of her in the hope I could stun her long enough to find a wooden stake,
anyway, so it was a good costume.  'Nightclub vampire', I'd call it.
     "Thanks," she said, frowning.  "Do you think the skirt is too
much?"
     Since I sort of thought she only had the one, and further that I
remembered when she bought it, I didn't want to say anything bad.  "No,
it looks good," I told her, fairly truthfully.  She was wearing dark
tights under it, which worked okay with the heeled boots.  She HAD to
have borrowed the boots, though I couldn't imagine from whom.  "Most of
it's in the makeup anyway.  Which is good..."  Kim's car caught my
attention as it pulled up close; by habit I'd parked my car next to an
empty spot so we could park together.
     "Uhhh boy," Jill commented.  "Let's hope she's not in a-  Val,
don't mention ANYTHING about clothing sizes o-"
     "I'm not stupid!" I complained, and tried to hit her arm, but she
dodged faster than I wanted to move, so I gave it up.  "Hey Kim," I said
as she got out.
     For a moment I thought Kim had repeated Debbie's costume of last
year, and flinched at memories, and then I thought she was doing a MIB
like Ricky, but then the ink on her fingers told me what it was, though
I couldn't read them from here.  "I mean, Jake," I said, and she smiled
in recognition.
     Then she said, "Hey, no costume?"
     I sighed.  "Too tired, no ideas, no time."
     She shook her head at me.

***
07:01 31 Oct

     I was the only one in here who wasn't in SOME kind of costume...
Even Miz Singley had risen, or sunk, to the occasion; she was doing a
'sexy witch' which I think was more to demonstrate her skills to the
class, because she had a bunch of makeup on, and inch-long fingernails,
and I think she'd added some hair.
     I sighed.  Not doing a costume had seemed like the easiest thing...

***
07:52 31 Oct

     There were a lot of costumes... seemed like more than last year,
though maybe I was just not remembering last year.  Or maybe I hadn't
been awake yet.
     "Ahhh!" I said as I remembered why very few OTHER costumes had made
an impression on me last year.  "Ahahahaha!" I added, as I realized what
I'd done since then...

***
07:56 31 Oct

     "Tuck!"
     Well, now I knew where Elwood was, and I suspected they wouldn't be
getting back together any time soon.  Jill waved a hand and took off.
     "Seen George yet?" Mike asked.
     "No?"  I looked, and he'd done the full dress white-tie tux,
complete with gloves and top hat.  "George! I thought you'd die if you
dressed up that much."
     "Fuck off, Tuck."
     "Not my type," I shot back.
     "Where's yours?"
     I sighed.
     "Tuck, take your meds before class," Mike warned.  I sighed again.

***
08:08 31 Oct

     It was not me that won the costume contest in homeroom this year.
I was not surprised.  I wasn't pleased either to be stuck in the same
category, that of Uncostumed, with Miz Vangormer.

***
08:11 31 Oct

     "Tuck!"
     *No, it can't be...*  It was.
     It was Debbie hailing me... and she wasn't wearing a costume
either, which was startling enough to stop my scream before it got out.
"You either?"  I shook my head.  "I had an idea," she said, and came
closer to me, which made me twitch and check for Mike - still there -
and she handed me something.
     'Hello I'm DEBBIE' said the nametag in my hand.
     "Neheheheh," I had to say.
     "Dobson cleared it, I already checked with him," she told me as she
dug out another piece of paper and handed it to me.  This one was a
schedule... her schedule, with markups of who would be where between
classes.  The next sheet of paper was a Dobsonian permission slip, with
his ideogram at the bottom.
     "I need to keep all my stuff though," I protested.
     She nodded hurriedly like she knew that and I was wasting valuable
time.  "Yeah.  Except we trade homework," she excepted, and handed me a
folder.  "Good idea?"  Meaning, would I go for it?

***
08:16 31 Oct

     I sat back down and prepared to take notes.  I hoped Debbie
wouldn't melt in my calc or physics classes; I'd almost decided not to
take notes in here, but Debbie wasn't up to my math level.
     "Aw man!"  *Bitch got my study hall!* I realized, a little too
late.

***
08:55 31 Oct

     The bell rang early, startling me, but I realized or remembered it
was a short day so they could do the costume judging.  Which I would be
skipping this year... totally above board, too.  "Heheheheh..."

***
08:57 31 Oct

     The halls were full of everything imaginable, though none of them
really stuck out as amazing.  There was one guy in a Babylon Five
uniform, that I hadn't known was a fan; and I'd seen one girl in a long
ornate dress that I had no idea what it was from.  I did know, though,
that it would be a bitch to wear.  I was glad it wasn't ME in that-
     "What, no costume?" Pam protested and I looked over and saw her.
She was doing a credible Xena; I didn't want to think about how much the
leather and jewelry cost.
     I smirked and pointed at my nametag, as I kept walking - I didn't
have that much time to spare, because I couldn't walk much faster if I
wanted to last the entire day.
     She curved in close and peered at it, then shrieked with amusement.
"Oh no!  I wondered what you were doing over here!"
     "Just going to classes," I said airily.  When she'd finished
laughing, I asked, "Is that chakram sharp?"
     "The what?  Oh!  No, of course not," she said like it was perfectly
reasonable to be carrying around a fake metal weapon but not a real one.

***
08:59 31 Oct

     I sure as hell hoped we weren't having a quiz in here, because I
knew nothing about-
     "Oh sh-  No," I remembered, because we'd exchanged homework in the
hall.  She'd had all her stuff in her pack set up like a filing cabinet,
with the dividers and everything.  I'd been - and was - envious.
     "Excuse me?" said Miz Williams as I stood around at her desk
thinking, so I handed her my copy of Dobson's note.  Debbie's schedule
had included teachers' names, which was good because I didn't recognize
several.  "Ohhhhh," she sighed as she read it, and handed it back to me
as my cellphone buzzed.  And she rubbed her fingers on her forehead like
she had a headache.
     "Thank you," I said, and went back to Debbie's seat - Pam was
pointing to it for me - and pulled my cellphone out quickly.  It was
Debbie's cell calling.  "Where's your paper?" she asked, without
preamble or handshaking or anything.  "English paper."
     "Fir- no, second in the stack, just behind the sociology- no, wait,
there wasn't any so-"
     "Okay," she agreed and hung up, just as the bell rang.  I put the
phone away and sat down.  Pam grinned at me.

***
09:40 31 Oct

     "Oh boy!"  I loved chemistry, and I needed a break after this
hellish lit class.

***
09:42 31 Oct

     There were a lot of what I thought was probably South Park, though
it was hard to tell since they didn't look like animated paper.  Another
couple of big dresses; I wondered how they managed to sit in the desks.
One cheerleader, dressed in scrubs, made me wish I'd come as Death; I
might could've tagged her with a scythe and 'claimed' her, and then what
would anyone have told the cops, that Death did it?
     I was enjoying the thought of this when I heard, "Tuck!"  I turned,
and it was Anne-Marie racing towards me, showing a lot more skin -
especially cleavage - than I considered wise today.  It was still fairly
chill, and leather wasn't THAT warm.  Especially that little.  "Where's
your costume?" she asked.
     I pointed at my nametag and kept walking.  If I could've managed, I
would've preferred skates, but if I could handle skating in here I could
probably manage to run, which meant I wouldn't need the oxy tank or the
cart.
     Anne-Marie snorted as she got my 'costume'.

***
10:24 31 Oct

     "Ohhhh..."  *WHY did she have to take FRENCH?*

***
10:27 31 Oct

     I stayed behind the Lara Croft in front of me; if she turned and
pulled one of those pistols - I couldn't quite be sure they were fake,
since some lamers like mirror-chrome finishes - I was planning to
pull some kids down in front of me, to shield me long enough to dump the
tank, and then we'd see.

***
10:29 31 Oct

     At least it wasn't Miz Vangormer.  I presented my note from Dobson,
and she read it, and sighed.  I then presented Debbie's homework.
     "We have a quiz in here today," Miz Valasquez informed me.
     "Uh... can I- can she make it up Monday?"  I crossed my fingers.

***
11:10 31 Oct

     "Oh Ghu..."  I rubbed my head, trying to get the stink-  *No, the
stench of French,* I realized, and found myself grinning even though I
was sick.  French was a language designed by psychopaths, I'd decided.
*Even Russian would be better than this!  Even Chinese-  well, let's not
go too far.*  Plenty of ideograms were not a substitute for an adequate
number of phonemes and compounds; it didn't matter what you could do
with tonals.
     And there were two Marie Antoinettes, and I didn't know which of
them had decided to do the French bath thing, but I'd had to be on a
rebreather the entire class.  Luckily, Miz Valasquez hadn't picked on me
once, so I got away with the easiest class I'd had all day.  Possibly
the easiest I'd had all year.
     As I got out of class, resolving never to go back there again, and
started walking towards the cafeteria, Paul Grant waved, and we veered
towards each other.  "What are..."  He stopped as I pointed at my name
tag.  He chuckled when he got it.  He was dressed in medieval type
clothes, or maybe sixteenth century pirate.  It was hard to
differentiate without some equipment, and he didn't have any.
     "Whoa!  Good one!" I said to and pointed at Anton Something, this
guy I vaguely remembered from chemistry last year.  He had on a
bathrobe, slippers, and the rear half of a fish sticking out of his ear.

***
11:15 31 Oct

     "Oh..."  Now I got what the girls had been doing, and a couple of
our guy littles.  "Ahah, AHAHAHAH!"
     Because Kathy was doing Hercules.  Superbly.
     I did an excellent improvisation of Eugene Tucker laughing himself
into an asthma 'event'.

***
11:17 31 Oct

     "Tuck?"
     I opened my eyes at the very worried female voice, and it was
Kelly... wearing a blonde wig, and carrying a stick; obviously
Gabrielle.
     "BAHAHAHAHA!" I gasped, letting out the vapors.  "Shit!"

***
11:18 31 Oct

     "Tuck!  Break!"  I opened my eyes and Mike was standing there.
"Okay?"
     I wavered my hand to show I was metastable at the moment.
     "Did you reload the emergency stuff in your pack?"
     I called him names in sign language that he didn't understand.
     "Fuck you you round-eyed little shit.  Need an epi?"
     <No.>
     "Need chest push?"
     I thought about it, and decided, <Not yet.>
     He thought about it, then said, "Laughed too hard?"
     <Shut up.>  I clinched my eyes shut so I wouldn't see Kathy or
anyone else.  <Watch my back,> I signed blind.
     "Right.  Fun's over!" Mike announced.  "And nobody say anything
funny!"
     I hurriedly jammed my fingers in my ears, because I knew that no
one could have resisted THAT temptation.  If I could've talked, I
would've tried something myself.

***
11:23 31 Oct

     "Andronicus!" I remembered.
     Matt threw up his hands and said, "Hey!  Not me!  I was somewhere
else at the time!"
     "Heheheheh... oh fuck."  I looked down, in hopes of stopping
things, and realized this was the first time I'd ever seen Matt in
anything close to pants.  "No shorts?"
     "Debbie said I had to," which made me shiver a little.  I could've
asked... but I didn't want to know.  Ever.  Anything.

***
11:27 31 Oct

     "I love having asthma," I lied to the crowd.
     "Hey, uh," Jill said with entirely too straight a face, "shouldn't
you be over there?"
     I looked where she was pointing, and it was the Pack.  And Kathy.
Still as Hercules.
     "Ahahahaha, no," I got out, then put my head down on the table so I
wouldn't see anything else.  And my arms over my head as a backup.
"Ahahaha!" I couldn't restrain.  "Heh. Shit."  I reached around and
cranked up the flow rate on the tank, just for luck, and tried to think
very calm and boring thoughts.

***
11:31 31 Oct

     "You never called me last night," Kelly accused me.  I was managing
not to laugh, mainly because the drugs tended to make me feel sick.
     "I w-  Oh, right," I remembered, a bit late.  "Sorry... I had to go
do some shopping for th- my job.  I got back late and had to cook."
     "Oh," she said.
     "That's a really good costume," I told her, and managed to keep it
to a smile.
     She frowned and said, "I thought you didn't like it?  You
laughed..."
     "Kathy as Hercules," I said, and then had to punch my own leg a few
times to keep it under control.  It worked, at least.  "Ah.  That was
inspired."  Xena would have been too damned predictable, now that I
thought about it; she did better as Hercules anyway.  "Who's doing
Iolaus?"
     Kelly grinned, finally, and pointed.  I looked, and somehow - I
hoped that they hadn't bribed him with promises of sex; or if they had,
they would follow through - they had gotten James T. Fanboy OUT of a
Star Trek costume and into a tolerable budget facsimile.  "BAHAhahaha!"
I banged my head into the table until I stopped.  "Ow."
     *I should've stayed home today...*

***
11:39 31 Oct

     "We Nubians have to stick together!" Book proclaimed, and he and
Paul slapped hands in some sort of pseudo-jive thing.
     "Heh."  I was glad it wasn't that funny.  Good, but not that funny.

***
11:44 31 Oct

     "You did all this?"
     Mike admitted, "Lot of it... Amanda called, wanted me to help do
it."  Amanda was Callisto today, I think.  I hoped; I was running out of
mythology.  "There was just no way..." he sighed, and started to run his
fingers through his hair, except they ran into his hat and he stopped.
     "Man, you did good jobs, though..."  They were pretty good, all of
them; and far far better in a group.  It was a damned shame that they
wouldn't be judged together.

***
11:48 31 Oct

     "Hey Tuck."
     "Oh..."  Sabrina hadn't gone with the Hercules/Xena thing, she'd...
"Alice?  Gothic Alice," I corrected.
     "In Fucking Wonderland," she said deadpan, and then grinned and
nodded.  It was really excellent, with a dark blue dress, and a gray
apron thing, and the shoes looked like Mary Janes except they were heels
with a little platform, and her stockings were gray too.  Gothic Alice,
in Fucking Wonderland, just like she'd said it.
     "Man, that IS good," I sighed.  And smiled, belatedly.
     "Tired?" she asked.
     As I nodded, George blundered through, saw Sabrina, and intoned,
"Would you like some TEEEAAAA, little girl?" and made his eyes bug out.
It was amazing how he could turn a normal tuxedo with all the trimmings
into the Mad Hatter just by acting naturally.  Naturally for George.

***
11:53 31 Oct

     "Debbie has a computer class?" I asked in wonder.
     "What?"
     "And I've got permission..."
     "What?  Give me that," Mike demanded, and hit my hand hard enough
that I couldn't stop him from pinching Debbie's schedule out of my
fingers.  "Oh no..."
     Before I could start laughing maniacally, Mike grabbed my hair and
lightly slapped my face a couple of times.  "You just almost had one,
don't have another one," he instructed me.
     "No, it's okay...  Oh my fucking god I've got a laptop too!"  With
an Ethernet card, and Linux, and enough 'network diagnostic and test'
software to make the network grab someone by the throat and strangle
them, like out of Bubblegum Crisis-
     Mike slapped me several more times, and I finally got control of
myself.  Mostly.

***
11:55 31 Oct

     Debbie caught my eye and gave me a questioning look.  I gave her a
thumbs-up in return, and we both grinned.  *That's why she looks so
tired,* I realized.  *Her and Mike... and Kim, I guess, before...*
They'd been working the night before, on costumes for all the Herc and
Xena ones, and probably makeup and hair too; Kelly wasn't that blonde
and Kathy's hair wasn't that dark.

***
12:01 31 Oct

     Miz Shelley gave me the eye as I came in, and waved me off as I
started to pull out my permission slip from Dobson.  *Well, guess Debbie
already 'explained' it in fourth period...*  I hadn't known we had the
same government teacher until today either.

***
12:45 31 Oct

     "What're you doing in here?!" Mister Greenberg demanded, looking
vengeful or something.
     I tapped on my nametag and pulled out my papers.

***
12:51 31 Oct

     "I told him that, and I showed him the papers, but he wouldn't
listen," I explained to Mister Dobson.  Who had NOT, thankfully, shown
up as Betty today; I only had so many doses of inhalants I could take in
a short time before I'd spontaneously ignite or disassemble or
something.  "He said if I didn't come here to the office..."  I
belatedly noticed Dobson had on Spock or elf ears.  "Heheheheh- damnit!"

***
13:02 31 Oct

     "Yeah, I gotta do like this massive load of baking today, I prom-
well, it's that work thing," I changed, probably too late.  Seeking
something to change the subject to, I found, "Hey, you know, it's too
bad you don't have a prize category for the best group, 'cause Mike and
Debbie really ki- uh, worked hard on getting a bunch of the crew to look
like Hercules and Xena, like the television series?  Series-es?"
     "Series," Dobson answered with a wince, like my unappreciation of
the stupidities of the English language hurt him specifically.
     "Anyway, you ought to give a group prize," I suggested.  "Those are
very nice ears, by the way...  Heheheheh-"  Punch self.  "-Ow.  No,
really."

***
13:16 31 Oct

     Dobson had decided that since it would be impolitic to make me go
into the computer lab, especially when that pathetic weefle dork was
'teaching' the class - not Dobson's exact words - and that since Debbie
was doing well enough in accounting, he'd give her, or me, an excused
absence for the class, the rest of the day actually, and I could go home
early.  And he'd given me a passport to get past the parking lot Nazis.
     It was when I got into my car that I realized I had no idea what to
do with the spare time.
     "Uh."
     There were lots of things I COULD do... if I had money to spare,
which I didn't really, and/or if I had just a little more time, which I
didn't, or if it was an hour in a different 'place' in my schedule,
which it wasn't...
     "Damnit!"

***
13:43 31 Oct

     Baking had won; I'd figured I could mix the stuff, if there were
enough bowls, and get the first batch or so baking, before I went to
pick Stella and Ricky up.
     "Ah so."  I hadn't noticed the carved pumpkins out front yesterday,
so either they'd been carved last night or I was still semi-oblivious.
I wasn't sure which.
     I entered the house, and found Hangover looking vaguely guilty.

***
13:46 31 Oct

     I could not find a trace of dog excreta ANYWHERE, and so I finally
gave up and went back to the kitchen.
     Hangover sat at the door and looked woefully at me.
     "Can you go by yourself?"
     'It's okay, I know you don't like me.  Nobody does.'
     "Get the fuck out," I suggested as I held the door open.  He
sniffed at the air, then looked just miserably defeated as I applied the
toe of my shoe to his ass and lifted and pushed him out.

***
14:04 31 Oct

     I checked my watch, to see if it was time yet, and it wasn't... not
for inserting cookies, anyway.  It was however time to poison myself.
"Oh god," I complained.  Smelling the cookies and tasting the poison was
going to be significantly worse torture than usual.

***
14:11 31 Oct

     "GET the fuck BACK in the HOUSE!"
     'I knew it was too good to last,' Hangover moped.  But he didn't
move.

***
14:28 31 Oct

     "D-darn," I modified instinctively, before I remembered that no one
was home.  Still, I had to go.  And turn off the oven first.  It was
really too bad they didn't have a timer on it like we did; I could've
set it up to cook up another batch just before I got home.  "Damnit!"
It was going to be at least an hour before I could have any.

***
15:06 31 Oct

     "How was-"  Ricky pointed the small widget at me and turned the LED
on, and I immediately grabbed my sunglasses and put them on.  "Worm!
Get in the car, K," I ordered.
     He laughed like a maniac, before he leaned over and inhaled at me.
"You smell nice," he said.
     "What are you DOING?"
     "You smell really nice!" he insisted.  "Hey, isn't that like a
compliment to a girl?  Dad says it to Mom."

***
15:39 31 Oct

     "Oh..."  I had forgotten the baking, but the smell reminded me as
soon as I got in.  That was probably what had inspired Ricky to go
faster than usual.
     I hustled towards the kitchen with Stella, and found Ricky working
on what looked like his third cookie, off the first batch.  "Aw, man," I
sighed, as he started to protest; but I should've known better.
     I then realized that there was absolutely no hope of him NOT having
at least a few, and probably a bunch; and if he didn't 'ruin his
appetite' with cookies he'd ruin it with Halloween candy.  Ricky was
still going, though, so I told him, "Don't talk with your mouth full!"

***
16:22 31 Oct

     "Valerie!"  I looked over and it was Miz Parker.  "Why do you have
the back door open?"
     "'Cause it's really hot?"  *Duh?*  Actually I wasn't sure if having
the door wedged open was helping or not; but it WAS keeping the rest of
the house from overheating.  I thought.
     "Did you get any done yet?" she asked, I thought hopefully.
     "Heh heh heh," I chortled, and pointed at the cookie tin she'd left
out, which was now full.  "Did you get any ice cream?"  I'd forgotten to
check.

***
16:28 31 Oct

     "I told you to save some room," I told Ricky, who was looking
woeful at his small bowl of cold ice cream and hot cookies, probably
because he couldn't stuff the thing down.  I'd only had two before this.
     Hangover, who had FINALLY figured out it was cold and uncomfortable
outside and come back in, was just looking woeful at us, like, 'I know
I'm just a dog and I don't deserve anything to eat, but you'd think you
could at least let a dog smell it close, just out of common decency...'
and on and on and on, which is why I wasn't looking at him.
     "Ohhhh, this's good," Miz Parker sighed in ecstasy.
     "Yep.  And it works best when they're just out of the oven."  Which
made me want to turn around and check the timer.  I managed to restrain
myself before I hurt myself, though.  Or before the dog caught my eye.

***
16:42 31 Oct

     "Damp washcloth," I suggested.  "Since there is NO way you're
getting the costume off him and washed and dried before he goes out."
Assuming it was wash-and-wear anyway, which for a suit was doubtful but
for a child's suit was the only thing that made sense.
     Miz Parker glared at Ricky, who immediately started making excuses.
I was a little surprised that she expected that a small boy wouldn't get
a costume dirty at school.  Even girls that age could be counted on to
stain or dirt up whatever they were wearing.  Susan had; she'd just
thrown tantrums when she did, like that would help or something.
     A faint knocking, as if at the front door, made all of us stop and
look at each other, even Hangover.
     "I'll-"
     I was faster than he was, today; I grabbed Ricky by a collar.  "Nuh
uh."
     "I'll get it," Miz Parker said, handing me Stella.  Stella, whose
head was tracking the dog, got within the danger range and started to
scream.  Hangover let out a Noise.  Ricky yelled something with his
hands over his ears, undoubtedly something uncomplimentary.
     So I guess I wasn't that surprised when Debbie walked in; it seemed
appropriate, like How Could This Possibly Get Worse?

***


Thursday, August 29, 2002 at 16:12:14 (PDT)
Name/Contact Info: Doragoon
(i am predicting that the world of tuck will end by oct. 31
1997, but story will effectivly end before that.)


Distribution:
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person or group.
Permission is given to redistribute this by electronic means, as long as
the entirety of the work (from the BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE header to
the END PGP SIGNATURE footer) is distributed, and credit is given to the
original author, me.  And no fee may be charged.
Archiving is permitted provided no fee is charged for access.

All rights reserved.


+ @>--,--'-----   Ellen Hayes   o===[--------      __      vicki .sig  +
                  -=[1990]=-                       \/      virus 13.4
+      http://www.barkingduck.net/ehayes     PGP key: EFC9 5D55 (1996) +



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