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Tuck The Party -*- Copyright 2013 by Ellen Hayes.

Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual
persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when
used for satirical purposes.

This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and
possibly sex.  If you are legally not allowed to read materials
containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading
this.  I am not responsible.
Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it
in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally
allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish,
state, and country.

All rights reserved.  See the bottom for distribution rights.


Tuck The Party


***
18:29 28 Feb

     "I think we had her fooled," Jennie smirked.  The smirk looked a
lot less annoying now than it had all day.
     "I think we did," I grinned back at her.
     "AHHHHhhhhhhh!" Nicole shrieked some more with her hands around her
face, staring around.
     "So start the fuckin' PARTY!" George screamed from somewhere, and
Tribal Dance cranked up.

***
18:30 28 Feb

     "Earplugs," I said as I handed Ms. Petersen a pair.  "Roll 'em up
like this," I demonstrated, "and stick 'em in your ears and let 'em
expand."
     Ms. Petersen did, and about as slowly as the foam would be
expanding, the pained look faded from her face.
     "And-"  I waved to get her attention.  "And if you watch the person
who's speaking to you, it's almost as good as it would be without the
earplugs."
     She nodded.  "WHERE DID YOU GET THESE?"
     Well, it took practice not to yell when you had them in.

***
18:33 28 Feb

     "Happy birthday, asshole!" Amanda shrieked at me as she threw her
arms around my neck.
     "Wait!  It's not mmm-"

***
18:34 28 Feb

     "It's NOT my birthday!" I yelled when I'd managed to pry her off.
     "It's MINE!" she screamed back at me.
     Then, when I lost initiative due to surprise, she grappled me
again.
     "Jesus getoffm-"  I pushed off her and ran into someone's breasts
from behind and then turned around to apologize and it was Julia who
grabbed me this time.

***
18:38 28 Feb

     "You have lipstick all over your mouth," Ms. Petersen felt it
necessary to mention before she took her own deep hit.  Either she'd
taken her plugs out or gotten used to them.
     Well, maybe it was necessary to mention the lipstick; fingery
exploration suggested there was a LOT of it.  And not just my mouth, but
all over my lower face.
     "I can't believe they did that in front of me," Nicole sighed
smoke.
     I sighed.  "Cheer up.  They could've done it TO you."
     "Ehhh!"
     Ms. Petersen was looking grim, so I threw at her, "Or you.  I
wouldn't bet they wouldn't."
     That made Nicole laugh.  Ms. Petersen did not laugh.
     The door opened and I tensed up as I turned.
     "What're you guys doin-  Oh," Jennie said as she stopped.
     "Shut the DOOR," I insisted.  "In or out but SHUT THE DOOR!"  Mom
got 'cranky' when reminded that she wasn't smoking, say like by the
smell of some of it getting into the house.  And by 'cranky' I meant
what most people would call 'PMS squared verging on psychosis'.
     She shut the door with her, and everyone else I guess, in.
     "Moron."
     I think Nicole was getting over the shock, finally, because she
asked, "Okay, so, like, when did you plan this?"
     "They called me yesterday," Ms. Petersen threw in.  "Mike?" she
asked me.
     I nodded.  "And I called Jennie, who called all your friends.  You
didn't give me a lot of time," I explained to Nicole.
     "I didn't ask-  Mom, I swear, I wasn't like hinting I wanted a
party or anything."
     My guts sank and turned cold.  "Uh, did I do something wrong?"
     "Nicole said she didn't want a party," Ms. Petersen told me, "so I
wasn't going to give her one."
     "I just thought it'd be lame, 'cause Mom wouldn't let me have the
house for-"
     "Oh no way," Ms. Petersen almost snarled.  "All those kids?  In MY
house?"
     "Why?" I wanted to know.  "I had to put a deposit down for this."
     They both looked at me like I was mentally deficient.  Nicole said,
"Um, 'cause Mom was worried that, y'know, teen party..."
     "Drinking, vomiting, property damage, theft, et cetera?" I guessed.
Ms. Petersen nodded.  "Yeah, if you see any of that going on, tell me,
an' we'll get rid of them.  I had to put a deposit down," I sighed.  At
least we had a plan for this.
     "Man!" Nicole complained, somehow not visibly; then the two of them
turned opposite directions and vented (visibly) like they'd rehearsed.

***
18:43 28 Feb

     The door opened and I prepared to yell at someone to shut it, but
the guy who came through wasn't one of the expected party guests, being
way over eighteen.  "Oh, that's where you went," he said to either
Nicole or Ms. Petersen.  And he shut the door behind him when he came
out.
     "Hey," Ms. Petersen smiled at the guy, who was a little shorter and
a lot darker than she was.  Also his hair was much shorter and receding.
He smiled back at her.  Nicole waved at him and half-grimaced but didn't
say anything, taking the opportunity to inhale another hit.
     So I wasn't too surprised when Ms. Petersen said, "Tucker, this is
my boyfriend, Larry Hood.  Larry, the host of the party and Nicole's
boyfriend, Tucker.  I'm not supposed to mention he has a first name,
right?" she asked me.
     "Bless you," I said to her with a smile before I stuck out my hand
to shake Larry's.
     "Probably something horrible," Larry guessed.  He had a strong
grip, but didn't try to crush my hand or anything else stupid.
     "Don't go there," I hoped.
     "You said it was okay to bring him," Ms. Petersen said.  Or maybe
she was asking.
     I said, "Oh, sure, no problem.  Do you want earplugs?" I asked
Larry.  "We may turn up the upstairs stereo later.  They're really easy
to put in, and take out when you're out of the noise.  Also, they make
it easier to endure the horrible crap kids think is music these days."
     He laughed.  "That's exactly what my dad told ME, back when I was
in school."
     Nicole and I both nodded; I knew I'd been complained at by my
parents, and I guess she had too.  Dad had also informed me that I was
going to have exactly the same problem with my own kids, from the other
side.  And, Ghu knew, I hated a lot of the crap my parents got all
teary-eyed over.

***
18:55 28 Feb

     "Of course we're making pies," George sneered.  "How could it be a
PARTY without PIE?"  He slapped at my head but I dodged, and he then
went back to whatever fruit he was tormenting on the counter.
     "God, this is like," Nicole said, shaking her head and smiling.
She didn't finish, she just kept smiling.
     "And- I hope you don't mind," Ms. Petersen said to Nicole, "I got
you a cake?"
     Nicole made a face.  "Why would I mind?"
     Ms. Petersen noticed she was playing with the earplugs in her hand,
squishing them and letting them reform - it was impossible not to; they
were such weird foam stuff - and stopped herself, before she made a face
back.  "Because you said you didn't want a party?"
     "I didn't want a BABY party, Mom," Nicole glared.
     "Well," I interrupted, "this is kind of a lame party by some
standards."  No booze, no drugs, bedrooms locked off...
     "I guess," Nicole said as she turned back to me, and more
importantly stopped arguing with her mom, "but, I mean, I don't THINK
you have to drink to have fun.  Right?"
     I agreed, "I don't think you do."
     "Hey, are the brownies done yet?" Julia asked as she came in.  "Oh
hi," she schmoozed at Ms. Petersen and boyfriend.  Then she stopped
schmoozing and turned to me.  "Tuck, what did you do with your parents?"
     "What parents?  I'm an android, I have no parents," I claimed.
     "Tuck bribed 'em with money to go out to dinner or something," Mike
said loudly.  "No, not that much- read the recipe, dumbass!" he said,
apparently to George, because it was George who hit him.
     "How much is this costing?" Ms. Petersen asked.
     "What?"
     "How much did it cost you," she repeated, in tones that suggested
I'd better stop screwing around and answer the question.  Which was bad
enough when I'd actually been screwing around, which this time I hadn't
been.
     "Oh, don't worry about..."  That Eye of Parental Inquiry she had
going was starting to hurt.  "Um, about thirty to make them go out, and
the bond on the house which I OUGHT to get back, so..."
     "Dude, seriously?" Nicole asked.
     "What about the food and drinks and so on?" Ms. Petersen asked.
     I waved that off.  "No, they-  Everybody ends up here too often
anyway, which is why I put up lists of ingredients and things.  So they
can bring 'em.  Also, Mom would rather get them into the stores.  Uh,
kind of a 'learn how to grocery shop' thing."  I grinned hopefully.
"Plus, I mean, you brought a cake, right?  So, no big."
     Pause, in which the Eye got bigger and hotter.
     "Dude," Mike said, which broke the enchantment, "don't be an ass.
Miz Petersen, if you'd like to- if you're OFFERING to throw some money
in the tip jar, as it were, we'd be very grateful."
     He kicked me, even though I was still trying to blink off the
aftereffects of the Eye, so I repeated, "Very grateful."  Then I
recovered and added, "But totally not necessary."
     "Would you?" Nicole asked her mom.
     "Nicole, I-  Ow!  Fucking stop!" I yelled as I swung at Mike as a
feint and dropped and hooked his leg and dropped him.

***
18:59 28 Feb

     "God," Nicole sighed, shaking her head.  "I can't believe you acted
like that.  In front of my MOM!"
     "What?"  Now I felt embarrassed, but I didn't know why.  Or, more
accurately, what I'd done, or what I was supposed to have done instead.
     "Acting like that.  Like a couple of GUYS," she sneered.
     "Hey, Nicole," Mike said over my shoulder, "it happens, even with
Tuck.  Sometimes.  Besides, at least he's not pulling that male antler-
butting crap with YOU."
     Nicole repeated, "Antler-butting?"

***
19:04 28 Feb

     Nicole blew out her sixteen candles in one go, which suggested that
she still had some reserve ventilatory - *Was that a word?* I wondered -
capacity.  There was much applause.
     "You gonna spank her?" Book asked me.
     "Oh, yeah, sure.  Nicole, c'mere," I said lazily, and winked at
Nicole.  I did not look at her mom or her mom's boyfriend.
     Nicole looked skeptical, so I mouthed slowly, 'Trust me'.
     And, by Ghu, she did, turning around and bending over slightly, as
everyone started making noise.
     So I took one finger and 'slapped' her rear sixteen times about as
fast as I could do it lightly.  "And one to grow on," I added with the
seventeenth.
     Someone complained, "You call that a spanking?"
     "I call that OUR spanking," I shot back as Nicole stood up, turned
back around, and hugged me.
     "Maybe you need to be spanked," she said into my ear, before
kissing my neck.

***
19:33 28 Feb

     I kind of wished that we didn't have the good stereo on the ground
floor, because the smart thing to do, in a way, was to have the dancing
downstairs in the overly-crowded basement, so it would be muffled by the
concrete.  Which definitely worked; the basement was mostly bulletproof,
and had a general gamma PF of about a thousand, if we collapsed the
flowerbeds onto the basement door and stayed away from the inside
stairway.
     As it was, though, since half the basement was taken up by the
electronics shop, that left half of it for fun; and that half was
obstructed by furniture that was too hard to remove, like couches.  So
it was kind of small.  And it had the secondary stereo.
     Conversely, the good stereo was upstairs; but that could lead to
visits by cops if we turned it up too loud.  Plus it made the kitchen
kind of loud, too, which inhibited food.
     But, for a few people, not too energetic, and not very picky about
sound quality, you could dance in the basement.  Which is what we were
doing.
     I don't know if I was getting any better yet from dancing with Pam,
but I thought I might be.  Nicole seemed appreciative, anyway.
     And, I thought it was a good thing, that Ms. Petersen and Larry
whatever-his-last-name-was had left.  Somehow, they felt inhibiting.

***
20:02 28 Feb

     One of the problems with having all these people in the house was
that it made it impolitic to take a shower when I was hot and sweaty.
They'd moan and complain if one of the three public bathrooms was locked
for that long.  Plus, I HAD to worry that one of them would attempt to
pull a towel or robe off.  And, I had to admit, dancing - or anything
else - in body armor just made the sweating much worse.
     Outside was nice and cool, and since it was dark I could unbutton
things and sort of vent, like a reactor.  The bad part was, Nicole
seemed to think that outside equaled smoking.
     "Come on, Tuck," she said sadly.  "It's not that bad."
     It was that bad, but arguing about it wasn't going to get me
anywhere except alone, as it were.

***
20:05 28 Feb

     Well, I hadn't argued, and I wasn't alone; several of Nicole's
friends - called out by Jennie - had come outside with me and Nicole.  I
was glad to see Nicole wasn't passing out cigarettes to the kids.  I was
not glad to see that at least one of them had her own.
     Erica asked us, "So did you see that new guy?  Kevin Bradshaw?  Is
he like hot or what?"
     Amy - not my cousin, some random Amy that Nicole was friends with -
sneered, "I guess, but he's so gay, I mean he spends all his time
working out?  Like weights and stuff.  How gay is that?"
     Jennie sneered back, "Well how'd'you expect him to get all
hot-looking without exercise?  Diet?  Doesn't work for guys."
     "Yeah but he's so busy 'working out'," Amy counter-counter-sneered,
"I don't think he even knows when a girl's interested in him!"
     "You?"  It was kind of weird how one syllable could transmit so
much scorn and fake disbelief.  Jennie had obviously specialized.
     "Not me," Amy claimed, "but Courtney Mallott?  She said she tried
to get him to ask her out and he TOTALLY did NOT get it.  Or ACTED like
he didn't get it," she said scornfully.
     Nicole gave me a look, and a little smile, or smirk, at that,
before taking another hit.
     The Pack was one thing; these girls were something else.  I wasn't
sure what.  But I was sure that I was glad I was going to be spending
the night with the Pack and NOT with all of these.

***
20:07 28 Feb

     "Yeah, I was totally thinking you wouldn't, EVER, which is why _I_
asked YOU," Nicole said to me.
     "Well, true," I agreed.  "Plus, of course, I never thought I'd have
a chance with such a hot babe as you."
     There was much acclaim.  "You are such a liar!" Erica exclaimed at
me.
     "So what?  Shut up!" Nicole told her.  "I like it!"  Which made
them laugh.
     "Hey Tuck?"  I looked and it was Sabrina.  Smirking, but at least
she'd shut the door behind her.  "Jill said your parents called and
they're gonna be here in about half an hour."
     Everyone looked at me.
     "That means," I explained, "that we're gonna have to turn the music
down.  And probably shut things down by like ten."
     "Oh man, I was going out after this!" Amy exclaimed.
     "What about you two," Natalie asked slyly.  "You going out
tonight?"
     "Nah, he had something to do," Nicole said before inhaling and
glaring at me.
     I filled in, "Yeah, my parents are going to be beating me until
late Sunday night."  That made them laugh, Nicole and Natalie visibly.
I didn't want to tell them that I was basically having a sleepover of
girls, and I really didn't want to tell them that they weren't invited.
On the other hand, I also really didn't want to be locked in my basement
with these girls overnight.  "Oh, hey, did you talk to your mom about
Sunday?" I asked Nicole.
     Nicole smiled and wiggled and sang, "She said yesssss!"
     "What's Sunday?"
     "I get to stay over again!" Nicole sang and wiggled.  There were
screams of disbelief, except from Jennie who I think had already done
her five stages of grieving.

***
20:16 28 Feb

     While I was sort of associated with Nicole, as it were, apparently
it was okay for me to dance with other women.  Even women I wasn't going
to be sleeping with tonight.  Jennie apparently liked me to dance with,
though she was as aggressive in dancing as she was with her insults.
Not like I minded.  Well, I didn't mind the dancing part.

***
20:29 28 Feb

     An alert tone got my attention and made me stop dancing.
"TOPSIDE!" said the PA system.
     There was some confusion from the dancers, and the rest of them,
but I knew it was one of my homeboys calling me to the ground floor.  So
I went.  Quickly.
     Once I got the basement door shut, I could hear the fuss in the
living room.  *Damn it,* I sighed, wondering what the hell had gone
wrong.
     It was some guy, that I think I'd seen with Jennie or one of them,
faced off against George and, from the looks of it, Jennie.
     "Hey Tuck," George said coolly, though he was faking it, "this
kid's been making fun of you.  Says you're a fag and such.  Been really
nasty about it."
     "Man, what the fuck?!" the kid squalled as he tried to shove George
or some such, as the other boys kind of giggled.  "Shut the fuck up!"
     "Just STOP it Brett!" Jennie spoke up, sounding not at all happy.
     "Tinisi turin," George said to me, which I figured was not going to
make sense to anyone else.
     But I thought it was kind of extreme.  "Why?" I asked him.  "You
call me gay and stuff all the time."
     George glared at me as the guy and some of his cronies laughed.
"I say anything _I_ say to your FACE, Tuck.  I wouldn't do it behind
your back, drinking your sodas, eating your food, in your own house."
     Which set off another round of guilty giggles from the kiddies.
     "Dude you're fuckin' lying!" Brett bitched.
     "No I am not," George said.  The faces of the kids around me said
that Brett had indeed been saying nasty things about me; or they
wouldn't have looked so caught-in-the-act.
     "I'm gonna fuckin' kick your ass!" would've been more impressive if
Brett had a deeper voice.
     George indicated the kid with his chin. "This sketi'd backstab you
if he had the dick for it."
     Which caused another squall and another attack on George, who
almost dodged this one, but he soaked the damage.  Jennie tried to stop
Brett, but he shoved her off and she ended up bouncing off the floor
before he stopped moving and re-started bitching.
     "Hold it," I demanded, and they both stopped, though Brett started
saying something.
     That was profound, what George had said.
     Plus, George wouldn't lie.  Not like that, not to me.
     Which was why George would be staying and Brett would not be.
     "You," I said to Brett, making both him and George stop.  "Get out
of my house."
     "Dude, I w-"
     "Get out of my house," I repeated.  "Leave.  Now."
     Brett's mouth twisted up and his hands balled into fists, and he
took a step forward towards me, and I felt everything go really slow and
kind of dreamy and quiet, and I found myself smiling.  And breathing
fast.
     "You have ten seconds," I breathed, "to get out; or I'm going to
HURT you."
     He stared at me.
     *And I will enjoy it,* I managed to not say out loud.  I did say,
"Nine."  I had to look at a clock, because time was kind of dilated.  On
the next tick I said, "Eight."  I was not supposed to be feeling like
this.  "Seven.  Six."
     He turned and left, whining something.  George gave me a nod and
followed him out, followed by Mike.  Mike looked at me, and I waved him
off.  He nodded, the same way George had, and went out.
     I turned to the rest of them.  "You will not insult me in my own
house."
     There were various protests of the 'hey, no, not me, never thought
about it' variety, but nobody challenged me.  Or looked me in the eye.
     "Tuck?"  Someone touched me and I backed-and-turned to find Jennie
looking surprised.  She said defensively, "I didn't know he'd be like
that, okay?  I'm-  He's-  I'm sorry," she said as she looked down at her
shoes.  Then she looked up at me again for just a second.
     I felt kind of down, and kind of tired, as I came down off the rush
I'd been on.  Also kind of hot and sweaty, but that might've been from
the dancing too.
     "Do I have to leave too?" Jennie asked, almost crying already but
not looking up.
     "Please don't call me nasty names any more," I asked.  Then I
smirked.  "They hurt my delicate feelings."
     She kind of laughed, and the kids really laughed, like it was
really funny, which it wasn't.  But I took her arm - gently - and took
her back to the kitchen, so I could have some ginger, because my stomach
was, I noticed, kind of upset.
     "Man, are you dumping me for that SKANK?" Nicole said with a grin.
     "Nicole, be nice.  Kathy!" I called, getting her attention.  "Help
Mike and George out front, front porch.  Where's Jill?"
     "Jennie?" Nicole asked as she clued in that Jennie wasn't feeling
well.
     Kathy replied, "Downstairs, I think.  Want me to get her?" she
asked.
     "No, go out front.  Please," I remembered.
     "I thought Tuck was gonna kill him," got my attention.  Jennie had
said it to Nicole, who was now looking at me kind of wide-eyed.
     I was going to say something else, but then remembered George, and
smiled and said, "If you're gonna make fun of me, do it to my face, and
don't take my hospitality here," I waved an arm to indicate the entire
house, "and abuse it.  Like Brett did."
     Nicole asked me, "What did you do to him?"
     "He's been removed, and if he comes back he'll be lucky if the cops
get him."  My stomach threw an interrupt.  "'Scuse me, I need some
ginger sauce."
     "Nauseous?" Kathy asked.
     I should've guessed that anything even vaguely medical would get
her attention.  "Kathy, please go to the front porch and help Mike and
George get rid of this fuck, so I don't have to fuck'im up," I asked.
Politely, I thought, but she left in a hurry.

***
20:33 28 Feb

     "Jill's calling his parents from upstairs - your computer school
directory - to come get him," Mike told me, "and we're fingerprinting
him and getting a blood DNA sample, for future evidence."
     "Oh good," I agreed, and had some more ginger.  "Sorry to bung up
the party."
     "It's cool," Mike nodded.  "Or, rather, it isn't.  And it's all HIS
fault."
     I asked, "You need me for anything?"  I hoped not; I really wanted
to beat the shit out of Brett, and I didn't need any more dealings with
cops.
     "Yo, rock the party," Mike instructed me with a finger gesture,
before he left.
     Jennie said again, "I'm really sorry, I didn't know he'd be like
that, I mean..."
     I nodded.  "It's only what you've been saying to me all day- all
year."  She looked upset.  "So STOP SAYING IT," I suggested to her.
     "Seriously, Jennie, it's not cool, okay?" Nicole said gently.
     "Whereas," I pointed out, "be cool, and YOU might get a party when
it's your birthday."  Jennie smiled a little.
     "But NOT Sunday," Nicole said to me, and lightly slapped my arm.
     "Nooooo," I agreed, with a grin, as the upstairs music came back
on, at a lower volume than before.
     "Awww," Amanda said into my ear, making me jump.  "Can I play too?"
     Before I could yell at her, she had a giggle fit.  Not that this
stopped me from complaining, or Nicole either.

***
20:35 28 Feb

     "Why-"
     "Ah!  Hi Dad," I gasped.
     "-and Kathy out front fingerprinting someone?" Dad finished.
     "Hi Mister Tucker," Jill said belatedly.  He nodded at her, and
then looked at me expectantly, like it was my fault.
     Ah, well.  "Asshole got expelled from the house.  Mike said take
fingerprints 'n DNA in case he does something stupid.  I'll send you
something later," and signed, <Report>, so I wouldn't have to say it in
front of the girls.
     "Very well," Dad told me, before checking his watch.
     "Maybe you could take Mom out to a movie?"
     He gave me an unpleasant look.
     "Dancing!  When was the last time you took Mom dancing?"  That made
the girls giggle.
     "Ten thirty," he said, and I sighed, and the girls sighed; none of
us thought that was the last time he'd taken Mom dancing.  "Did you eat
anything besides cake?"
     I thought.  "I haven't even had cake," I realized.
     "Pizzzzaaaaaaah!" Natalie demanded.
     "Can you make pizza?" Nicole asked me.
     "Not good pizza.  Can't do the dough, and we don't have a good
pizza oven," I sadly replied.
     Natalie pseudo-raged, "PIIIZZZZAAAAAHHH!"

***
21:18 28 Feb

     "If you attempt the Macarena in this house," I warned them, "it
will set off the nuclear weapons in the basement."
     "Dude, not kidding," George assured them.  He, Kathy, and Dad had
come back in when Brett's mom had picked Brett up and driven away with
him.  I assumed there would be a lecture, but that wasn't my problem.
     The doorbell went off, and I took the chance to escape.

***
21:22 28 Feb

     "I am going to kill myself," I sighed.  I hadn't thought of what
the smell of pizza would do.
     Nicole replied sadly, "Oh, don't do that... C'mere," as she patted
her lap.
     We wriggled until my head was on her lap, as she sat on the porch,
smoking just enough above me, and downwind, that I wasn't choked.
     Pause, in which she smoked, and stroked my hair.
     "Wait," I realized eventually, "it's your birthday pizza in there.
And you're out here," I mentioned in case she'd missed that.
     "I asked, uh, Kathy?  To save me some.  I thought you might feel
bad," she said sadly.
     Well, I did; and I felt worse for feeling bad.
     "Maybe you ought to go to the doctor," Nicole said vaguely.
     "Nooooooo," I whined.

***
21:31 28 Feb

     "And then maybe we could dance some more?" I hoped.
     "Oh yeah," Nicole agreed, so in we went, and down into the dance
pit, finding many of the kids and the stereo pumping out a techno mix of
mine.

***
21:56 28 Feb

     "C'mon!" Jill yelled at me.  I shrugged at Nicole, who shrugged at
me, so we both stopped dancing and followed Jill upstairs.
     When I shut the door again, Jill smirked at me as she presented me
with a bowl.  "Made you some stir-fry, Wimpy-Belly."
     "What?  No way," I said.
     "Awwww!" Nicole said approvingly to Jill, and hugged her a little.
     Jill complained, "Hey, none of that!  I date guys, remember?"
     "Oh fuck you bitch!" Nicole got out before she started giggling.
     "She just likes the food," I shrugged, though I was smiling too.
     Jill replied, "S'why I made two."  She was going to smirk herself
to death if she wasn't careful.
     "Now," I said as I took the bowl, "if I just had-"
     "Chopsticks?" Jill proffered with the hand that hadn't been holding
the bowl.
     "So what're YOU doing tonight, gorgeous?" Nicole asked as she
tilted her head flirtatiously at Jill, before smiling seductively.
     "Man, get the hell away from my woo-man," Mike complained as he
appeared.  "Out out out out!" he ordered, pushing her a little bit each
time towards the hallway, not the dining room.  "Or no pie!"

***
21:57 28 Feb

     But Jill came out with Nicole's bowl, and a fork, just as I sat
down next to Janet and was trying to figure out how to feed Nicole with
chopsticks.  Jill had thrown in some ramen noodles too, I noticed, and
approved.  She was turning out a half-decent cook.
     "What the hell is that?" some kid asked.
     "Stir fry.  Jill made it," I smirked.  And, since Nicole had hers,
I had no reason to restrain myself any longer.
     Nicole said, "And it is totally vegetarian, and low-cal, and
delicious.  Right Tuck?"
     "Mmmm," I said, not wasting time in talking.
     Erica asked, "Can I try some?"
     "Grrr!" I growled at her for half a second before resuming stuffing
my face.
     "Oh," Pam said as she came in the front room with a bowl, "this is
great!"  She reached out with her fork hand and hugged Jill.
     "HeyheyheyHEY!  I date GUYS!" Jill shrieked.  "What IS it with you
people!?"  Though I noticed she wasn't exactly fighting to get away.
     "Is that good?" Janet asked.
     "GRRRR!" I insisted.  When I got to a clear spot a few moments
later, I mentioned, "If you ask nice, Jill might let you have some.
This is normally a six or eight serving recipe."  Though I might be
having more than usual, since there wasn't any rice.  Plus, of course,
our recipe system adjusted for number of users.

***
22:28 28 Feb

     "Best party ever," Nicole sighed as we held each other.
     "Really?"
     She let go a little, but not entirely, and looked at me.  "Well,
I'm sort of counting the last two weekends too," she smiled.  "And
tomorrow-  We can come over for Sunday dinner, right?  Larry too?"
     "Right," I agreed.  "Uh... did-"
     "Jill gave me a list?"
     "Oh good," I sighed, and pulled her closer.
     Nice warm cuddly pause.
     "Can't I stay over tonight?" she whimpered into my armor.

***
22:58 28 Feb

     "It was a great party," Jennie grinned.  "Thanks!"  Then she
grabbed me and pulled me down and her up and kissed me on the cheek,
which I thought was nice.
     Then she whipped over and kissed Nicole the same way.  Then she ran
for her apartment.

***
22:59 28 Feb

     "Dude, she kissed you," I smirked as we got back in the car.
     "Dude, she's SO hawt," Nicole smirked back.

***
23:10 28 Feb

     "Gee, I wonder where Mom is," Nicole stated.
     "Uh," I said cleverly.  "I thought I saw-"
     "Shut up," she said gently.  Then she indicated with her fingers
that her mom, and I eventually figured her mom's boyfriend, were doing
what we wanted to be doing tomorrow night.  Well, we wanted to tonight
too, but those damned friends of mine were in the way again.
     "Oh."
     "Duh," she said, shaking her head.  Then she pulled me over and
kissed me on the lips again.  "You're so cute when you're dumb."
     "Derrrrrr," I gibbered, and thought about drooling but decided
against it.

***
23:41 28 Feb

     "We thought you might be staying over with Nicole tonight," Julia
smirked at me.
     "I wish," I sighed.  "I mean, you're my friends," which was the
problem, "but it's really nice snuggling with her."
     "And fucking her?"
     I guessed she was trying to be shocking.  "Oh, that too,
definitely," I agreed.
     She shook her head as she announced, "Tucker you are such a SLUT!"
     "Well, yeah, I guess," I smiled.  "But really proficient at it."

***
23:53 28 Feb

     "Oh, no, Mike!"  Either he or Jill had gone into my room and found
where I'd put the guest nightgown and sleep shirt I'd bought.  "Why do
you do this to me?!"
     "If I let out my evil side in little doses like this, it doesn't
interfere with the rest of my life."
     "You d-  Did you get my pig?"
     That, I think, made up for the nightgown; I could hear the gears in
Mike's head grinding as they didn't mesh.
     "Oh," Jill sang, "Tuuuuuuck?"  She was waving my pig and smirking.

***
23:58 28 Feb

     Kathy said, "What would she," meaning Nicole, "think of you like
that?"  'That' being a too-small-for-her bra Sabrina had brought, to
donate to me - it was a tolerable fit, which I found annoying and
embarrassing, but not enough to refuse it - and 'my' guest nightgown,
and my pig.  Kelly had been bullied into the sleepshirt; I hoped the
pink and embroidery wouldn't give her psychological scars.  She looked
like a toddler wearing mommy's nightgown, too.
     "She'd probably think, uh, something...  I can't think of the
word," I complained, and had some more ginger-Dew to spur my thoughts.
"That I was sexy and she was going to take advantage of me."
     "You are such a pair of pervs," Jill sneered before she had some
brownie.
     "You started it first!"
     "And threw you away like a used kleenex!"
     Sabrina complained, "Ow!  That was NASTY, Jill!" as she hit Jill in
the shoulder repeatedly.

***
00:36 1 Mar

     We'd talked over my relationship, and I'd gotten some disapproving
looks but nobody really complained.  I guess the talk we'd had Monday
was doing some good.
     Or the pig was blessed.
     Then they'd started in on Jill and Mike, and so I was sitting
behind Jill, playing with her hair, as she sat next to Mike and the two
of them supported each other.  Psychologically, I mean; I was supporting
Jill, and Mike was sitting up like he had a spine.  And my pig was
supporting my neck.
     "So it's JUST sexual," Kathy scoffed.
     Mike complained, "You say that like we're not friends.  I mean,
shit, I've been wanking all this time anyway, it doesn't matter THAT
much!"
     "Now that you did it the first time," I added, causing a low
chuckle.
     "Well, yeah.  And for that," Mike said, and picked up Jill's hand
and kissed it.
     "That is kind of nice," Julia mentioned as Jill got embarrassed and
swatted at Mike.
     "So JUST friends?" Sabrina questioned.  "What happens if it goes
further than that?"
     Pause.
     "Shit if I know," Mike said.
     "Probably..."  Jill looked at Mike.  "Probably not?"
     Mike agreed, "Yeah, I dunno.  We might, and then again we might
not."
     "The odds are, not," I mentioned.
     "Yeah, so," Mike agreed, but squeezed Jill's hand anyway.  "I still
want to be friends.  And hang out with all you chicks in nightgowns."
     "Shut the fuck up, Mike," I said, since Amanda and I were the only
ones in actual gowns tonight.  Plus Kelly, if a sleepshirt/tent counted.
     "So what if one of you wants to- wants to stop before the other one
wants to?" Sabrina asked cautiously.
     "We just do like Tuck did, either with Jill or with Pam," Mike said
out loud, mentioning The Relationship Of Sorts That Shall Not Be Named.
"Stop.  Then I pine away quietly."
     Jill asked, "What if it's me?"
     "Oh, please.  Me, guy, dick," Mike pointed at himself and then the
offending appendage.  "Never satisfied, very stupid."

***
01:06 1 Mar

     Out of all of us, Kelly was the only virgin left, and Mike had
probably had the easiest loss-of-virginity-incident.  Mine was adjudged
second-best, due to being in a house all night.  Mike had claimed he won
because he didn't have to crossdress to get laid.
     Unfortunately, and it made me feel a little bad, it had pretty much
gone downhill from me.  MOST of them, thankfully, were merely low-
quality or rushed.
     "I bet Nicole would've won if she was here, though," Pam smirked,
and smiled at me.
     "At least for the longest session," I smiled back.  And got a
small pillow in the head.

***
01:12 1 Mar

     "Oh, hey," I remembered.  "Nicole had her period last week, and I
had questions."
     "Oh TUCK!" Mike whined.  "Do we have to discuss PERIODS?"
     I opened my mouth to complain, but someone bumped me into silence,
and then everyone was staring at him.  Or glaring at him.
     Pause.
     Eventually he closed his eyes in pain and said, "So that would be,
'yes we have to discuss periods.'"
     As he waved his hands like 'carry on then', Julia mentioned, "Well,
if you talk about 'em- and like we've been talking about other things,
like an adult, then you'll know-"
     "Seriously," Kathy nodded, interrupting.  "Major points with girls
if you get periods.  I mean get the idea!" she shrieked, but it was too
late, we were all laughing at her.
     "Dude," Jill said to Kelly, "I think she really IS queer.  Go get
'er!"  Kelly made a happy face and pumped her fist like she'd scored
already, which made Kathy start laughing helplessly as she tried to
protest.

***
01:28 1 Mar

     "She let me see-  Well, she sort of asked and sort of insisted- no,
that's too strong.  But she sort-  Oh, fuck.  I saw her insert and
remove a tampon," I spat out.  "She wanted me to see it."
     "I can see that," Kathy nodded.
     Sabrina said, "That is WEIRD."
     "Well," Kathy said to her, "I mean, MY mom had me watch her, back-"
     "Oh for real?  That is gross!"
     "Well, how did you learn how?" Kathy challenged.
     Sabrina huffed a little.  "Oh, she showed me, but like on me, not
on her."
     "So did mine," Amanda said.
     Kathy asked, "You don't think THAT'S gross?"
     Sabrina shrugged.  "She said she used to diaper me, and all that,
so it was kind of the same thing.  Embarrassing, but I...  I didn't find
it gross at the time."  Her face looked like she was finding it gross
now, perhaps.
     "Shit," Pam sighed.  "I had a dance teacher do it; my mom...  She's
just too uptight."
     "Dude, that's lame," Mike said, and Pam nodded.
     Sabrina asked, "Hey, Kelly?"
     "My dad's girlfriend.  I mean, he was-  He wasn't like bad, but we
were both really embarrassed, and..."
     "Yeah, it is kind of-  You're paying attention, right?" Kathy asked
Mike.
     Mike said, "Oh yeah."  She glared.  "No, Kath, you're right, I
might have to deal with this sometime.  Like Little-Val?"
     "Oh shit," I sighed, because that STILL hurt.
     "So, like, excuse my maleness, but what's to learn about putting
one in?"

***
01:53 1 Mar

     There was stunned silence.
     "Uh, I guess not," I guessed.  Maybe Nicole WAS the only one who
got horny during her period.
     "Dude," Kathy said.  And then nothing else.
     Julia asked Kathy, "Is it safe?  To have sex during?"
     "Yyyyyeah, I think so," Kathy admitted.  "No reason it wouldn't be.
I mean, use more protection-"
     "I ALW-  More?"
     "No, just the usual," she answered me.  "Plus gloves, if you're
using hands," we nodded at each other.  "And a dental dam if you go down
on her."
     "I didn't.  Not that night."
     Kathy said, "Yeah, well...  Hey Kelly?  Would you go down on a girl
who was having her period?"
     Kelly boggled, "Seriously?"
     "Well, the only ones in here who would go for girls are you, Mike,
and Val.  I just wondered."
     "Ahhh," Kelly pondered.  "I don't know, I really don't."
     "I mean," Julia contributed, "it's sort of a Feminine Mysteries
thing," and you could hear the capitals though I had no idea what it
meant, "but UGH.  Was it messy?" she asked me.
     "Yeah, but old towels and bleach.  I mean old like Mom's not going
to complain if they're stained."  As a partial defense, I added, "She
said it made her feel better.  The- the sex, or the orgasms, did."
     There was much contemplation over this.
     "I've tried that a few times, when I had cramps," Amanda
volunteered, "by m- myself, but it was just... messy."
     Kathy asked, "Tried it in the shower?"
     "You always say that, Kath.  Are you half mermaid?"
     "I'm from Florida!"
     "Okay, can I ask something?" Mike asked.  "How much blood are we
talking about here?  It always varies," he anticipated.  "But, like, a
quart, or-"
     "Oh, no," Kathy shook her head.

***
02:32 1 Mar

     "Tuck?"
     "?"
     Mike sighed, tiredly, "Get your fucking hand off me you fucking
pervert."
     I huffed in irritation and rolled over - taking my hand with me -
and jammed my body against Jill, and put my arm over whoever else I was
next to.
     *Julia,* I eventually decided.  *And having her period,* because
she smelled a little different than usual, like Nicole had last week.

***
9:31 1 Mar

     "Tuck?  You getting up?"
     "Nnn," I decided, and rolled over.
     "He's just like a dog," someone said, and I wagged my tail in
approval.
     "'Cept he doesn't shed as much."
     Mike said, "He also types better.  C'mon Tuck, upsy daisy."
     Okay, that was weird enough I had to look.  I did.  It was Mike,
though.  "Did you just say 'upsy DAISY'?"
     "Worked, didn't it," he said smugly.
     I sighed in irritation.  And then the nausea hit.

***
09:40 1 Mar

     Mike was still around when I got out of the bathroom; I'd managed
to avoid spewing on the floor, or getting any on my nightgown, but then
I'd sort of paid for the GOOD luck by dry-retching a lot, which hurt a
lot worse than actual vomiting.  I rasped at him, "See what happens when
you say things like that?"
     He handed me some Dew, which when tasted had ginger syrup in it.
     "Okay, I take it back," I sighed before I had some more.
     "Tuck," he said, "this has gone on too long."
     "Oh, man," I moaned, because I didn't want to get stuck with
needles, and Doc Treble had a definite attraction to needles.
     "Quit whining.  Man up."
     "I don't have to," I whined in the highest pitch I could manage,
"not in this!"
     "Do not make me kick your ass, Tuck," Mike warned.

***
10:12 1 Mar

     "And don't forget to clean your ears," Kathy insisted.  "Did you
clean 'em last night?"
     "My ea-  Oh, yeah, I did," I nodded, trying to remember if I had or
not.

***
10:43 1 Mar

     "Oh hey Terri," I smiled as I came in.
     "Oh hey," she smiled back at me, which she didn't often do.
     "Coming to supper tonight?"  Because I thought that was the reason
she was smiling.
     "Oh, um, would that be okay?"
     "If you don't mind throwing in some groceries, or some grocery
money."
     "Oh... like how much?"

***
11:07 1 Mar

     And, damnit, I DID look good in these boots, as long as I had
Rachel's long black coat.  But my own red knit hat and gloves added
something, and then the new makeup too.  "Wonder if she has a gray
scarf..."

***
11:32 1 Mar

     "Huh?"  I looked up from my laptop, and it was Sheila.  "Oh,
right."  Well, it was only to be expected; I was here for an appointment
with her, after all.  I'd been working on the report for Dad, about
Brett last night.
     "You look nice again," she smiled.  "Did you just come from
church?"
     *Why would she thin-*  "Oh, no," I said, shaking my head as I
packed up my laptop.  Of course, she wouldn't be thinking of me wrecking
a church, which was way more likely than me attending one, which was
undoubtedly what she HAD been thinking.  "I just got these boots a
couple of weeks ago, and I wanted to wear 'em.  They're warm if you wear
socks with 'em."  I carefully stood up on said boots, and didn't
embarrass myself.
     I collected my stuff, and we walked into her office, and she shut
the door as I took Rachel's coat and scarf off, exposing the mostly gray
sweater.  "See, I kind of thought they would go with the gray, or with
black too."  Like the black skirt, heavy and long, that was one of my
favorites, because it had pockets, which for no sane reason were rare in
women's clothing.
     I stopped patting the skirt and sat down, making sure to smooth it
under me.  Being around Sheila was strangely like being around my
grandmother, except Sheila's head didn't explode like Grandmother's
would've upon seeing me dressed in women's clothing.  But I wanted to be
on my best feminine manners around her.
     Sheila approved, "Oh, definitely," and I felt better about the
whole thing.

***
12:03 1 Mar

     "I was thinking, though," because I had been, though mostly as I
was driving, "that maybe I shouldn't tell her THIS weekend, because
we've only got the one night and then it's back to school."  Plus I was
looking forward to doing something besides talking.  "So like maybe next
Friday, so she has the maximum amount of time to recover, and then maybe
she could talk to some of MY friends if she had questions or something
she didn't want to ask me."
     "That's not a bad- excuse me," she corrected.  "That's actually a
good idea.  So, why exactly are you considering telling her so early?
How long did you wait until you told, um... Pam?"
     "About, uh, negative one year," I said, grinning.
     "Oh, she knew-"
     "Right, from last year," I nodded.
     "So you've never really told a, a major relationship, about your
gender issues."  We called them 'issues' since she thought 'explorer'
was a little too odd, and I wasn't exactly 'dysphoric'.  And 'physio-
logicaly-challenged gender' took so much explanation I might as well not
use a label.
     I started breathing fast, I noticed, but could say, "Not-  Not
since Travis, no."
     "And he already knew, right?"  I nodded.  "Wow.  So it's like
coming out, isn-"
     "Except you wouldn't EVER come out to a, a romantic partner, as
like homosexual, I mean you wouldn't HAVE to, because..."  She was
nodding at me.  "When would you?  I mean, if you're talking to a- a sex
partner, wouldn't they already know?"  *Duh?*  But I suspected she had
something else in mind.
     "Not so much at your age, but it happens sometimes that someone
will marry heterosexually, and then discover they have a preference for
their own sex."
     "Oh man, that sucks.  Oh, but, I-  I mean, I don't want to give up
Nicole, I mean sexually."  That was an embarrassing thing to say, I
realized too late.
     Luckily, Sheila almost never got embarrassed.  "Right... and that
does seem to be a large part of your relationship right now, so-"
     "Is that a problem?  I mean, the girls were complaining about that
with Travis.  Like that was all there was and so it was like..."
     "Well, of course," she smiled, "we therapists would prefer that the
more intimate relationships are intimate on all levels."  She shrugged a
little.  "But, it takes time, and a lot of work, on both sides, and it's
risky, so-"
     "Risky?"
     "Opening yourself to be intimate with another person makes you
emotionally vulnerable."
     "Oh."  I'd been thinking something else.  "Right."
     "So, it's maybe not a good idea to try to be intimate in all areas
very quickly."
     "Oh.  Am I going too fast?"
     "Well, I don't know," she said, like I should've guessed she would.
     "I mean," I added, "we've been talking since like October or
November, so I kinda know her."

***
12:53 1 Mar

     "Oh, sure," I said to Dave.  "But you have to go shopping 'n buy
some of the food.  Where's Rachel?"
     "She had to go visit her parents," Terri said.  "Friday night."
     "Nothing serious, I hope?"
     Terri shrugged.  "Not like I know of, anyway."

***
13:09 1 Mar

     "Oh yeah," I decided as I looked at the cucumbers.  Those and
yogurt did something.  So I needed yogurt too.

***
14:42 1 Mar

     "So, why do you come here and change, and then have to go home in a
hurry with the groceries in the car?" Dave asked as I prepared to go
home in a hurry because I had groceries in the car.
     "I-  It's weird," I said, hoping that would stop things.
     "Oh, do we need to come help?" Terri asked loudly from the
television room.  "Fix the food?"
     "Not really," I called back.  "Dinner's at seven, and that's when
the food comes out and people eat it; so be there about six-thirty or
so if you want to actually eat."

***
15:31 1 Mar

     "Hey Tuck," Jennie said.  "George said I should help?"
     "Oh, yeah... if you want to eat," I said, while trying to remember
if I'd invited her today or not.
     "Why are you wearing a gas mask!?"
     "So I don't barf."  Better safe than sorry, I'd said to Dad, which
is how I'd ended up with a anti-paint respirator, which had much cheaper
filters than the M42A1's NBC-certified ones.  It was working well enough
that I probably ought to take it to the Parkers' house tomorrow.  It
definitely smelled less pepperminty.

***
16:17 1 Mar

     "_I_ did," George emphasized.
     "YOU invited her?"  *And she accepted?!* I thought, but I couldn't
actually get the words to come out.
     "Yeah, me!" he said defiantly, before he picked up his pies and
headed for the oven with them.
     *Okay, this is like the Fourth Seal or something,* I decided before
turning back to the kitchen Mac.  "Wait, what is 'ouzo'?"

***
18:41 1 Mar

     "Oh hey," I waved to Nicole's party of three.  "Go grab a seat,
it'll be a few minutes."
     Nicole complained, "What?"
     "Why are you wearing that mask?" Ms. Petersen asked.
     *Damnit.*  The good thing about the M42 was that it had a
microphone, which this did not, and a sort of PA loudspeaker that
attached called a 'voicemitter', which this did not.  "ASK MY DAD!" I
yelled, and got back to the food, which was almost done.

***
19:02 1 Mar

     "This is a meal of the ancients," I announced, "because I did some
Greek stuff, with the yogurt and the salads, and some East Indian raita,
as well as the usual Italian or Roman and Chinese.  Play ball!"

***
19:10 1 Mar

     Some dumbfuck had rung the doorbell, but I ignored it, as I wasn't
sick yet and thought I could use the calories while I had the chance.
Or at least get something in there to throw up later.  I had NOT enjoyed
the dry heaves this morning.

***
19:11 1 Mar

     "TUCK!"
     I looked up in irritation, because I might not have that long to
eat it before I got sick of it, or just sick.  Jennie was standing there
with an older woman who was a little taller than she was, and a rather
weirded-out looking near-teen male.  "My mom?" Jennie complained, like I
should've guessed that.
     "Oh," I said, and wiped my mouth - with a napkin, not my sleeve
like some people I could've kicked - as I stood up.  "Hello."  I hoped
like hell that they weren't looking to eat, because we were about out of
room and I didn't think we had that much surplus food.  "I'm Tucker," I
said as I came around the table.  "Jennie and I have cosmetology class
together."
     "Right, and he had the party last night for Nicole," Jennie
explained.  "She said she wanted to see where I was eating, and meet
your parents," she said to me.
     "Uh," I said as I turned around, but Mom had already caught on and
was standing up and poking Dad.  "My parents, Bill and Sarah," I
introduced.  Dad looked as happy to be interrupted as I felt.

***
19:14 1 Mar

     "Well, actually, I've got dinner on the stove myself," Ms. Demarais
said, which made me feel a lot better; she'd probably leave, instead of
hanging around here and eating.

***
19:17 1 Mar

     "Bye Mom!" Jennie said with a happy face.  I waved and smiled.
     They got in their car, and we went back in, and I managed to catch
our front door before Jennie could slam it.  Which hurt; she'd really
wanted to slam it.  "Ow.  Hey, she's GONE; let's go eat!"
     "Bitch," Jennie grumbled, but quietly.
     "Oh sh-  Nobody better mess with my plate!" I shrieked as I lurched
into a higher gear.

***
20:13 1 Mar

     "Oooh nooo," I said as I shook my head.  "I am SO not cleaning up.
It's a RULE."
     "Aw, come on," Nicole enticed.
     "No!  Not after I shopped and cooked!"
     "But we could do it together!"
     "Tucker," someone I didn't want to be there said from behind me.
     "Oh no."
     "Yep," Doc Treble confirmed.

***
20:18 1 Mar

     "Tuesday, eight forty-five A.M.," Doc Treble agreed with a grimace.
But I'd been firm.  "Anything else?"
     "My breasts hurt," I sighed.  "Like, ache, all the time."  Which is
why we were doing this upstairs, in my bedroom with the door shut.
     "Hmm," she said, and took more notes.  Then she fondled me, which
hurt, which I complained about.  And she took more notes when she
stopped.  "Anything else?"
     "No."  I didn't want to admit as much as I had already.  Plus I
couldn't think of anything else.  "Oh, am I supposed to consult with you
about exercise?"
     She gave me a look.  "What kind of exercise?"
     "Uh, dancing, sort of lessons.  And running in the mornings."
     "In the cold air?"
     "With a breath mask!  I'm not stupid.  Or suicidal."
     She sort of rolled her eyes, except it was her whole head.  "Are
you vomiting during the running?"
     "Uh, sometimes."
     "Go slower," she instructed me.  "Vomiting means you're over-
exerting."
     "I figured that out."

***
21:24 1 Mar

     "I go out and have one.  And then..." Nicole trailed off, with a
smile.
     "Jeez, Ni-"
     "I know," she interrupted, "It's like I'm addicted or something?"
     "Something like that," I admitted, as I realized that I wasn't
going to win this one.

***
21:38 1 Mar

     As I shut the door, Nicole and I both sighed at the same time.  I
think hers was in relief.  Mine was too, mostly, but I was also kind of
tired.
     "Oh, man," she sighed, sounding kind of tired herself.
     "Still wanna?" I hoped.  Half-hoped.
     "Oh...  Can I take a shower first?"
     "Sure.  Want company?"
     She gave me a look.  "Like take one together," she confirmed.
     "Well, we could.  I'm just sayin'."
     A smile was starting to slide over her face.  "Is this some kind of
come-on?"
     I huffed.  "Yeah, Nicole, I'm going to trick you into having sex in
the bathroom because I can't possibly wait ten minutes to have sex in
the bedroom."
     She shook her head as the smile fell off.  "Dude, no, I mean, did
you want to?  You don't have to treat-  I mean, you know, a girl likes
being enticed sometimes?"
     "Oh.  Sorry, 'm tired," I apologized.  "Uh...  Okay, you said, 'is
this some kind of come-on?'  So I say back...  Oh, no, not at all, just
you know, if you wanted me to scrub your back or wash your hair or
something."  And smiled innocently at her, which made her start
giggling.

***


Amy On Ouzo:
> Something you must never, never, never taste if there's a Greek
> offering it to you. Because a Greek drinking ouzo will keep sucking
> down that unbearable swill, and convincing you that you must do so, as
> a friend, and the next morning you will think that friendship with a
> Greek is fatal. Or ought to be. For him.
>
> Still, given a choice between ouzo and retsina, choose death by
> ravenous rats. Verminous ones.


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+ @>--,--'-----   Ellen Hayes   o===[--------      __      vicki .sig  +
                  -=[1990]=-                       \/      virus 14.1
+      http://www.barkingduck.net/ehayes     PGP key: EFC9 5D55 (1996) +



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