Message-ID: <6708eli$9712231405@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Archived-At: From: Ellen Hayes Subject: NEW <*> Kelly's Diary #1 (teen ff) Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Path: qz!not-for-mail Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded X-Story-Submission: X-Original-Message-ID: <19971223152637.1232.qmail@nym.alias.net> -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE----- Kelly's Diary: Excerpt #1 - Copyright 1997 by Ellen Hayes. No part of this work may be distributed as an original work by another person or group. Permission is given to redistribute this by electronic means, as long as the entirety of the work (from the BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE header to the END PGP SIGNATURE footer) is distributed, and credit is given to the original author, me. Archiving is permitted provided no fee is charged for access. Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when used for satirical purposes. All rights reserved. Furthermore, This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and possibly sex. If you are legally not allowed to read materials containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading this. I am not responsible. Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish, state, and country. Kelly's Diary: Excerpt #1 I have no choice except to write all this down, because when I am like really old and married and stuff, I will probably blank all this stuff out from my head like my parents did if I don't have a reminder or something, and I know I hate it when my parents lie and say things like, "Well when we were young we never wore that much makeup or went out all the time or stayed out past nine or anything else fun." That's sort of a distillation. So I'm writing my life down so I can tell my kids that I did that stuff too and that you'd better not do X Y or Z because like, see how much trouble it got me into? And not just because I'm being a like completely repressive crypto-fascist. "Shhhhh," Amy warned me as we snuck through her yard. I nodded, which she couldn't see as she turned around almost immediately. I sighed. This was usually how it worked. She lead, me follow. It wasn't my idea, of course, to go spy on her sister instead of watching a video at my house. It usually wasn't. Not that this made any difference to my idiot parents if and or when we got caught. "Well, you didn't have to listen to her. If she said to jump off a bridge, would you?" they would say, in one of those totally meaningless Zen koan parent questions that cause half of all teenage runaways. This of course ignored the real cause of the problem, which was that they had decided to move from Cincinatti to this godforsaken hellhole of heat and insects called Texas. I screamed and screamed the first time I saw a cockroach that was longer than my thumb, and so did Mom. But did they get smart and move back? Guess. Anyway, the reason I listened maybe a little too much to Amy, was that we'd moved here in like the middle of a quarter or whatever they used here, and I had like no way to get into the cliques or really make any friends. She was the only one who would talk to me. These people were so stuck up it was sickening. And they called it "The Friendship State" too. Surprise, not. So when I had exactly one friend I could talk to, was it any surprise that sometimes the idea of friendship got in the way of abstract ethical reasoning? Apparently it was to my parents, but I think they'd spent too long in college, and forgotten what it was like to be sentenced to prison five days a week for twelve years for the crime of being born. They were like that. So here I was, sneaking around in Amy's back yard, hoping to God I don't run into any of those mutant gasoline powered roaches, because if I do I am going to start screaming and never stop. They fly down here. It is the grossest thing in the entire world, worse than all Friday the 13th movies put together. Even worse than having your brother tongue you. Not that that ever happened to me, but the idea was gross. But at least he was mammalian. Amy had said, "Hey, my sister's got her boyfriend over," which is what had started it. This time. Us being thirteen each, we knew what a boyfriend was, technically, and had had some sort of relations with guys that went under that name but wasn't really, and of course we'd seen movies, and I had actually read books (one of the reasons, by the way, why I had no friends here - I made the mistake of carrying a book in to school that I was reading voluntarily) that dealt with the topic, both from an abstract level like those books clueless parents give teenagers so they don't have to answer embarrassing questions like "What was the grossest thing you ever did on a date?", and on a more practical level from romance novels read under the covers. Mom didn't approve of things like that, and she'd hassle me about how they perpetuated stereotypes et cetera et cetera et regurgitata, which word I made up in Cincinatti back when I had friends plural. So, we'd laughed and made up improbable stuff about what they were doing, and laughed ourselves sick at the idea of them doing laundry together or cleaning the gutters or something. It was kind of that sort of late, you know how it gets. I hope. So as we were sitting there, not saying anything as we tried not to laugh any more, Amy said, "No, I wonder what they are, like, really doing there?" "Do they kiss?" I asked. Amy just snorted when I asked this. Sometimes she could be really snooty, when she felt like it. I mean, okay, so I didn't have a big sister, and my seven year old little brother was a little far away from dating, so I just didn't have the opportunities to see this stuff go on in real life, but that was no reason to act like she was special or something. So I said, "I bet you don't know, do you?" just trying to irritate her. "Oh, God, they kiss all the time!" she said, but I was still mad. "You're making this up," I told her, and she said she wasn't, and so maybe fifteen minutes later we were sneaking around through her yard to go watch them kiss, and if I was wrong I was gonna have to buy her a Drumstick at the 7-11. She eats those things like they're gonna run out someday so she'd better stock up on the taste experience while she has the chance. And she makes me buy them every chance she gets, so this was like not surprising, and I knew I was going to lose, but my Dad mumbled something about the wages of friendship one time when he loaned his best college friend Mom's new car and it got wrecked, so this was like the same thing. And a lot cheaper. I didn't ever bother figuring out what I would get if I won. There wasn't a point. So we were sneaking through the bushes around Amy's house. I had enough clue that I wasn't making any noise almost. So her going, "Shhhh!" was kind of annoying. I mean, it was really annoying, but if I said anything then I would have been making noise so it would have liked proved her point. So I kept shut. Amy claimed they would be on the back porch, which I really had no reason to argue with, but did anyway, so we were especially quiet as we came around the side of her house. This was the time to be absolutely silent. So we were, and really slow, but we finally made it up to the window. There was, thank God, enough room for both of us. I slowly moved up, and peeked in. And it was dark. Whee. So I stuck my hands around my eyes so it was like a periscope or something and waited for my eyes to adapt. When they finally did, sure enough, they were face to face like it was going out of style. I sighed, quietly, and sure enough, Amy poked a finger in my ribs to make sure I got the point. Yes, Amy, I thought to myself as I poked her back. I don't even know why I bother betting with her any more. So we watched them go at it for a long time, and it was kind of exciting, I mean, unlike at the movies these people weren't even getting paid to do this to each other, and I kind of liked her boyfriend 'cause he was nice to me when I met him a couple of times. And Amy liked him too, but said he was all wrong for his sister because of it, because she was like the penultimate incarnation of evil, and one of the signs out of Revelations, and it wasn't right for her to contaminate him like that. I thought it had more to do with the way Amy's sister had probably had like thirteen years of taking the blame for Amy like I was getting sort of and had just had enough, but I didn't say anything because she was my friend and I liked her. I was just getting cramps in my legs and I was going to try to suggest to Amy without talking that maybe it was time to sneak back to the house, when they pulled loose and started talking to each other about something. I couldn't hear what they were saying, even with my ear pressed up against the glass, but when I turned back I got a certain idea about what they were going to do, because Amy's sister who I guess I should start calling Sandy because this is going on a lot longer than I thought it would, but there's like so much I have to write down. Um, what she was doing was unbuttoning her boyfriend's pants. He's Rob. So she was like unbuttoning Rob's pants, and my legs suddenly didn't hurt any more because I turned entirely into my eyeballs. Amy poked me again, which was entirely unnecessary, so I poked her back. We were like real close to them, and sort of in their line of vision, but Amy had picked a good spot because we could see everything that went on, which was pretty darn exciting, especially since neither my mom nor Amy's mom would take us to movies where stuff like this went on. And as for sex ed class, forget it. You'd think they would either change the name to reproductive boring biology introduction and birth control class, or like tell us the real stuff, but I'd come to the conclusion last year that the whole purpose of school was to like make sure we never learned the real truth about anything and we'd just accept what we were told without remembering it so if they changed their minds about what they wanted us to think later on, they'd just put it on TV and we'd take it like we'd known it forever. So I don't know quite what Amy was doing, but I like pushed hard up against the glass so I had a better view of what was going on. And Sandy pulled something I could barely see but I knew what it was out, and then no lie, she slid off the old couch they had back there and got on her knees in front of Rob. And I thought, Oh my God, she's gonna DO IT. So of course Amy had the same thought, so of course she jammed a finger so hard in my ribs I almost screamed, so I slapped her shoulder to tell her to stop. I mean, what was I gonna do, remember that I had to get home and do the dishes or something? Not hardly. Sandy was like licking at it, and I had this weird idea that it tasted like a Slim Jim or something, which was ridiculous because what was he going to do, pickle it before a hot date, and the idea of him soaking it in like marinade or something was so funny I almost started to laugh but I caught it all in my hands. I was so quiet Amy didn't even poke me, but maybe she wasn't listening anyway. Then Sandy got down to like serious sucking on this thing, or maybe I should say something else but I don't know the word because what she was doing was moving her head so it went in and out of her mouth. Rob must've liked it because he like tried to grab on to the cushions. I was like completely fascinated by all this. So was Rob, although his eyes were completely shut and I could almost hear him making noise. But I guess he was sort of in the middle of the action so he didn't have to look. Sandy was doing it, and I guess she'd done it before or something, because she was really going at it, and she wasn't looking like she was gonna get sick or anything like I'd heard about. And Rob wasn't complaining I don't think. I was a little startled by the feeling of wet that I got between my legs, but like I said, this was really fascinating, and I kept thinking like What if it was me doing that? Because Rob really looked like he was enjoying it and Sandy didn't look unhappy either though I couldn't see her face. It was really exciting and I wished sort of that Amy wasn't there because I sort of knew what to do when I got that feeling, and one of these days I was going to get it right and have one, except I had this sort of worry that once I figured out how to do it I wouldn't stop. But I didn't think it was too serious a problem. So what I did instead, was sort of rub my legs together, which made me feel all sort of better, even if it wasn't quite good enough. I even glanced at Amy to make sure she wasn't watching, then tried to open my mouth like Sandy's had to be. Sort of practice. Rob was starting to like thrash around a little on the couch, and I forgot what I was doing again and watched really hard. He was pulling the cushions up, and it almost looked like he kicked Sandy once, but I guess not or she didn't mind or something because she kept going. Faster, even. You could hear him by now, and he sounded really out of breath, and something else which I guess was what a seriously on the edge guy sounded like because I'd never heard anything like that before. He was really into this. Finally, he had what we would call in English class a climax, because he let go of the cushions and grabbed Sandy's head, and he made a noise I could hear easily, and his back like arched completely off the couch, almost pushing Sandy over, and he kind of just twitched there for a while, and then he like collapsed back on the couch. You had to wonder what it tasted like, so I did, but I guess Sandy was wondering too, because while I was rubbing my thighs together and hoping Amy wasn't looking at me, Sandy got up off the floor and rolled something which had to be a condom off his dick and then buried it in the trash. I guess she didn't want to leave it on the couch or something. I mean, it seemed like a good idea to me. Sandy put like a towel or something on Rob's lap, I guess to catch the stragglers, and then just climbed on top and started kissing him again. She was moving back and forth too, and I wondered if she was trying to get him up again for a second shot, when I wasn't busy trying to pretend it was me up there on top of Rob's lap rubbing back and forth. I don't know what Sandy felt like but I felt darn good, and I resolved to ditch Amy when we got back to my house and try some of this out in the bathroom while I was faking a shower. And it was my house, so there wasn't gonna be any question of who got the bathroom first. Amy poked me in the shoulder, lightly, which is why I didn't slap her harder than I did last time, and did it again when I didn't look at her, so I did. She was grinning like any lunatic you've ever seen, and pointed at them with her hand about waist level so they couldn't see it. When she held up two fingers, I nodded, and she turned back to the window and we both started watching again. I mean, I wasn't completely clueless, I could tell when a party was over, and this one wasn't yet. They stopped kissing for a second, and Sandy got off Rob's lap. I was busy watching him stuff himself back in his underwear and zip up his pants when another poke from Amy distracted me enough that I noticed Sandy dropping her underwear on the couch. Oh my, I thought, her turn. How nice, they take turns. I'd have to make sure that happened to me when I got a real boyfriend I wanted to do things with. Rob got up, and Sandy sat down, and then they laughed at something, and Sandy handed Rob a little pillow which he stuck under his knees. I guess he had more delicate bones than Sandy or he wasn't used to it or something. Mental note, have a pillow, I told myself. Sandy pulled her skirt up, and you could see everything, sort of, but it wasn't that interesting because I saw it every time I could stand to look at myself naked in the mirror. Except she had more hair. And she had more curves, which meant more fat. That made me feel a little better, I mean, it was pretty obvious Rob didn't think she was too ugly to talk to or anything else, and she had more curves ie fat than I did. Even if her boobs were bigger. I've got these little high bouncers of pain on my chest, and Mom said that when they get bigger they'll stop hurting which I am like counting the days for, or I would be if I knew when it would happen. Rob started rubbing around on her thighs, right around her sensitive spots, and she looked like that was the right thing to do, because she grabbed onto the seat cushions just like Rob had. It was kind of funny. He rubbed all around, almost like he was massaging it, and then Sandy couldn't stand it any more. I could almost hear her whining for something which I could guess what it was, but when he didn't do what she wanted, she grabbed his head, early I thought, and stuck him right where she wanted him. I couldn't see what he was doing, of course, but I had a good imagination, and it was sort of in overdrive at this point, and I was going to have to change panties before I went to sleep. Sandy was like stroking his hair, and had almost the same look that he did earlier except it was like she was more in touch with the world or something because of the way she kept stroking his head. Amy made this little noise, and I looked over at her to see what she wanted. From the way her eyes were closed, though, I don't really think she wanted anything from me, so I turned back to the window and made sure that I didn't look at her any more. I also made a little resolution to not make noises like that because I was kind of embarrassed for her even though, thinking about it later, I guess I would have made a noise like that sooner or later myself. I mean, I knew we were both thinking about the same thing, and it was like tremendously exciting, and so I guess what it all came down to was that I was glad it was her that did it first. I wasn't going to let her forget it either. Rob's hands were still rubbing around on Sandy's legs, and then he stuck them under her butt, which she sort of helped him with by lifting up a little, and then he did something back there which I hoped wasn't gross because she like shoved herself into his face and her hands slipped off his head and almost ripped the cushions in half. She made a noise too, like Amy's except I hoped Sandy's was louder because I could hear her pretty well, and I hoped they hadn't heard Amy the same way. This went on and on for what was like forever, and I was sort of hoping that she would finish finally, because all I could think about was getting back to my house and my bathroom with the locked door and the nice sound-deadening shower and testing some of this out, but I guess Sandy wasn't as bothered as I was or something because like I said, it was taking like forever. She almost started beating on Rob's head at one point, which almost spoiled the mood for me and everything else because I was going to laugh so hard, but then she started doing the twist on the couch and grabbed Rob's head and liked shoved him even harder into her crotch and let out something which sounded like an old train whistle. I had to stop and put my hands over my mouth when I heard that one. But I don't think anyone was listening to me, because Sandy like levitated off the couch, even more than Rob had, and like held him in there and I swear to God, I saw this as clear as day, her legs were stretched out on the floor and they were like, vibrating, I am not making this up, it was the weirdest thing. This was something I'd never ever heard about, so I paid attention when I wasn't watching her face. Her face was like, I dunno, but someday I want a boyfriend to make me make that face. It was like a complete epiphany sort of thing. I guess if you've ever seen it, you know what I'm talking about. Like she was plugged into God or something. She hung there for a really long time, longer than Rob had, her legs just buzzing away like she was having epilepsy or something, and then finally fell back on the couch. Then she started to cry, which really surprised me. I mean, what, she didn't like it or something? Want to trade? I wanted to ask but of course didn't. Rob got up real quick and like held her, which I thought was really sweet but then like I said he was always nice to me. She held on to him like she was drowning, so I guess it wasn't him that made her cry, or something. I had no idea. Amy poked me one last time, and I was gonna slap her like completely through the window or at least try, but when I looked so I could aim, she was pointing back the way we came. I guess she wanted to tell me the show was over, which I could kind of guess when Sandy burst into tears, but I kind of wanted to see what the end of that was going to be, sort of waiting for the credits. But I do that in movies too, and Amy hates it, so like do you need two guesses to tell me what we did next? When we got out to her front yard, she took off running, so I did too even though I was looking around trying to figure out why she was running. No clue. I swear, sometimes I wonder if it's like sunspots that make her act like that, I mean, it's like she's not quite in the same world the rest of us live in, and it's like she gets messages that the rest of us just do not get. That's nicer than saying she's a lunatic, which I'm sure is not literally true because it has nothing to do with anything as predictable as the phases of the moon. She ran all the way to my house, and so did I, about thirty feet behind her all the way. This was going to tire me out, and besides if I wasn't careful she was going to beat me into the bathroom, though right now I was beginning to think of a shower instead of you know. This place is so hot and wet that nothing evaporates, it just sort of drips off you like mosquito gravy, which by the way there were plenty of this time of year too. This place was just completely gross to live in. I didn't manage to catch up to her before she climbed in through my window we'd left unlocked, but at least she didn't shut it before I got there. She even helped me in, for which I thought about forgiving her for the like improvised marathon we'd just been on. We both just kind of collapsed on the floor of my bedroom and tried to breathe quietly. I was just glad to get back in the air conditioning, though I was sure I was going to leave like this Kelly shaped spot of sweat on the carpet. Eventually we passed below like the hundred degree mark again, because Amy said, sort of up at the ceiling, "Oh, man, that was SOOOO COOOL!" Then she turned to look at me and asked, "Don't you think?" "Yeah," I had to agree. "Wow, did you see-" and so we talked it over start to finish about five times, and made sure that neither of us had missed anything, which sort of wasn't possible the way we were both staring, but we wanted to make sure. I didn't mention the noise Amy made, though, because just as I was about to, I wondered all of a sudden if she'd seen me rubbing my legs together and I thought if I brought her thing up then she'd bring that up and then we'd both be like terminally embarrassed. So I didn't mention it. Eventually, though, we got the facts straight, and then there was quiet for a long time, I guess as we thought about it. I know I was thinking about it, and taking a shower again, and of course I didn't actually know what Amy was thinking about but I bet it was something similar. So I was startled when she asked, "Have you ever kissed a guy?" "No," I said without thinking, which was a bad idea because then she was going to tell me all about the time she kissed this one guy she was dating before she broke up with him, I mean, it couldn't have been that serious or they would have been together more than a couple of weeks and like had more than two dates or something. More wages of friendship, I guess, is what I thought, so I asked, "Did you?" I was sort of getting ready to tell it at the same time as her because I remembered it so well, when she said "No, not really." I was completely blown away. I mean, she'd SAID she did, so like I blew out before I could stop myself entirely, "But you said-" "He kissed me like on the cheek, and I didn't want you to think I was like a prude or something," she sighed, and picked at the sole on her sneakers. "I mean, I'm like the only girl in seventh grade who hasn't gotten kissed yet." This was so completely astonishing, that I couldn't even say anything for a long time. She kept picking at her shoe. "Well," I finally said lamely, so it wouldn't be so quiet any more, "I mean, I haven't gotten kissed either yet..." Amy looked up at me, and it was like one of those moments where you really connect with someone else. "I thought you had," she finally told me, and I was like sort of insulted, in a way because it was like she wasn't listening to me again, and I hated that, but in a way it was like a compliment or something that she thought it was believable that I'd been kissed. So I shook my head, and she shook her head, and it was so sad that it was sort of funny. I mean, we certainly looked better than that painted tart Laura who already had like this real boyfriend in high school and made it a point to show up to a party or school or whenever she got the chance with her makeup all smeared like it was evidence that SHE had someone to kiss, thank you very much. So I got a major case of the suppressed giggles, which weren't suppressed any more when Amy asked what was so funny, and I managed to tell her without I hoped making any embarrassing noises while I was trying to talk and laugh at the same time. She thought it was sort of funny too, when I explained it, which I guess is why I like her. So like girls do when they truly hate someone, we started making fun of Laura and her sluttish ways, and imitating her, I mean, not only was she like this total slut apparently, but she kissed so much teacher butt at school it was sickening, and she had way too much money too, and, well, she had so much going for her that she really deserved nothing but contempt, which we heaped on in like shovelfuls. When we'd finally run that topic into the ground, or I guess buried it, we kind of leaned back on the bed, which is where we'd moved at some point, I dunno why Amy did but I was glad to get out of the wet spot I'd left on the floor. I guess it wasn't really a wet spot but the whole idea of just laying there in my own sweat was like completely sickening. We sighed, taking a breather, and just looked at each other for a while. I mean, I couldn't see anything permanently wrong with Amy as far as the kiss-me department, so I couldn't figure out why she hadn't been. I knew why I hadn't been - I was chicken. Yes, you read it right here, Kelly Ferguson is too much of a coward to let any guy actually make lip lock with her. Ha. So much for my ego. "So why haven't you kissed?" she asked, like she was telepathic or something. This was one of her more irritating talents, because she could always tell when I was thinking something that would embarrass me if I said it out loud, and then she'd ask me about it. I wished I knew how she did it so I could practice it on other people, but she claims she's not doing anything. I think she lies a lot about things like that. It would be just my luck to make friends with the only alien human crossbreed in Texas and when I figure it out for sure I'll be abducted and they'll do all sorts of horrible things to me and then let me go and then I'll be like this tabloid queen like Whip-Me Streiber and I'll die of shame entirely. And Amy will go to school the next day and sucker someone else into doing things like this. "I dunno," I said, which was always a good answer, but it only postponed the inevitable this time, because she got this look in her eye which I already recognized as being like, I know you're hiding something in there and I'm going to find out what it is. It was depressing sometimes, either it was her powers talking to her or I had this great big sign on my forehead which spelled out anything I was thinking of. Luckily Amy was the only one in town who could read it. You would think my parents could but I'd spent most of my life trying to make sure that they never could except when I was hinting about presents, but it didn't work then either. She finally got it out of me, that I was scared. I stuck my face in a pillow so I couldn't hear her laughing at me like I knew she was going to. She tapped me on the shoulder for a long time, and I ignored her for a long time, but finally I lost patience and stuck my head out. She was looking at me like laughing was the absolute last thing on her mind. "Me too," she said in this little voice. "What? YOU? You can't be scared! I mean, you talked me into going up on the roof at SCHOOL, for God's sake, you can't be scared..." "It's different!" she said back, like I was totally stupid, which sort of reassured me, I mean, Amy looking human and scared and vulnerable and things was a little too scary a shift to deal with. I mean, this was the girl that got into a yelling match with an English teacher about how spelling was so bogus on account of the way French and English had interbred like hillbillies which was about the time the assistant principal stepped in and gave her like a week of detention. So I asked, "How?" She sighed, and flopped back down on the bed. "I dunno, it's just, guys, you know, like they used to try to beat me up and take my lunch and stuff, and now they want to go out with me or whatever except they are still like completely totally children, you know?" I did know. Brats. I wondered when they were going to grow up, although certain leftist Commie feminists on the Comedy Channel insisted that they never would, they'd just get jobs. Some of them. So I told her all this, and she nodded for a second. Then she got sad, and sighed again, and told me, "But what am I going to do if I never find one that grows up?" I shrugged. "Be a corporate executive or something and fire them a lot?" That made her laugh. She wanted to go into business, I think because she could mess with more people's heads that way if she was like a vice president or something, but I was sort of biased, having my head messed with so much. "No, really," I added, trying to be nice and supportive and all that friend-in-need stuff, "you'll find somebody someday, really. What about Brian Gilcrest?" Brian was her latest boyfriend de nom, meaning in name, since at thirteen it was impossible to do any real dating things like get away from relatives or friends or stay out late or drive or anything. She made a face. "He's just my boyfriend because he asked nice, I don't like him." Now that was a lie, because I kept seeing her look at him in the halls, so I called her a liar. "Oh, well, what about Mikey-Mike?" she pointed at me. Argh. I hate it when she turns the tables on me. "Well," I said lamely, and she started to laugh. So I started to laugh too. It was all so stupid anyway. I told her that, and she nodded. "I mean," she sat up again, "I mean, we're thirteen, right? Right at the beginning of the prime of life, except for being incarcerated for being born," Amy had the same views on education I did. I might have given her a meme when we met, but it like wasn't my fault. "So what do we need guys for? All they are is a hassle, right? Like when you let Mikey-Mike cheat off your homework," which was sort of a sore spot with me because I was getting a little tired of letting him do it when all I got out of it was a thanks and nothing else, I mean, he wouldn't even stop in the halls to talk to me. "Or when I got Ray that stupid birthday present and I went to all the trouble to mail it to his house and he didn't even say thanks or ANYTHING!" "Right, they're all completely stupid and forGET 'em!" I raised my fist at that like I was making a speech or something, and she giggled and made a fist of her own and then we like slammed them together like we were metalheads or something. Then everything got quiet, I guess because I'd said all that needed to be said on that topic and we were both trying to think of something else to talk about. "I wonder what it's like," she finally mused. I say mused, because it was like she was inspired. At least, that's what it looked like when I looked at her. "What's like?" I asked. "Kissing," she said in this tone of voice that was totally unlike the usual boy-are-you-stupid one she used when I demonstrated that my telepathy was way underdeveloped compared to hers. "I dunno, I guess...." I thought about it. "It's supposed to be a lot of fun..." which was kind of lame but true as far as I knew. Even my parents had been observed doing it when they thought nobody was watching. I guess they didn't want me to get bad ideas like they were normal or something. "I don't think I'll EVER know," Amy said sadly, and then like turned over on the bed so she was looking off the edge and all I could see was her back. It's a Texas thing, I think they're embarrassed by being The Friendly State so they try to disprove it every chance they get, but it's like reflexive so I didn't blame her for it. After a couple of minutes, though, I realized that it wasn't just Amy demonstrating she could be as rude as anyone else if she wanted to be, and I knew she wasn't tired yet. So I poked her in the arm. "Hey what?" I asked her. When she turned back over, I was like completely horrified to see that she was like crying. She sniffled and even before I could reach for a kleenex or say anything she kind of wailed, you know how people talk when they're crying, she said, "I'll never get kissed and nobody'll ever want me and I'll die a virgin and I HATE IT!" She smacked herself in the head with her fist in time with the last clause, which worried me because this was like most unusual behaviour for her. So I grabbed her fist because I couldn't stand watching her hit herself, and then something happened that was kind of complicated, I don't remember it too well, and then I was like holding her as she cried really hard on me. And I thought, as I was like patting her on the back and stuff, I mean, we'd just seen Sandy do this and then here was Amy doing the same thing maybe half an hour later, so I like wondered if it ran in her family or something. Of course the circumstances were like completely different, but this was like the second time tonight I was surprised by someone crying, and they WERE sisters, so you had to wonder. I was saying stuff like, "Well, I dunno but I think you're pretty, I mean, all the guys I talk to," which was not like a large number but it was more than one, "think you're pretty and stuff, and I dunno, I think we're just at one of those stages, you know? So it's not a big deal yet, I mean, it's not like we're in high school yet or anything," and so on and so on. She finally stopped really crying, and settled down to this sort of steady moan, that she could keep up for hours if she was anything like me when I got seriously depressed. I did that a lot, but I mean, I WAS living in Texas, and that would depress anyone. She sniffed, and I got her something to blow her nose with instead of my shirt which was my first fear. We sort of ended up looking at each other, and she looked embarrassed. "Sorry," she finally said, and started staring at her feet again, "I, I mean, it..." "I know," I told her, and unlike some times when I say that, I really meant it because I really did know. It could be like seriously depressing some days, being thirteen. I hugged her instead of like trying to say anything, and she hugged me back really hard, like she was trying to crush the tears except it was my body instead, but I didn't say anything because she needed me right then and she was my friend. I could breathe in a minute. The moaning sort of slowed down as she squeezed. Finally, she let go, and I tried to make it not obvious that I was trying to catch up on my breathing, but she didn't seem to notice. She was wiping her eyes and face instead. "Thanks," she sniffed, and I nodded, because, well, she'd done it for me and not made me feel bad about it later, one of the many times I'd gotten depressed about moving. "I just wish I knew!" she said, really suddenly at me. "Knew what?" She kind of sat back and started to leak tears again. "What it was like. Being kissed...." I wished I could tell her, but like I think I already mentioned, I hadn't been burdened with that particular life experience yet, and on my bad days I thought I might have to go into business like Amy just so I could afford to pay someone who was like not completely grody to like kiss me because that was the only way it was going to happen. "Well it can't be that hard," someone said, and I almost looked around before I realized it was me saying it. Amy and I both tried to figure out what my mouth was saying. "You mean like, you kiss me?" Amy asked. She'd gotten it about half a note before I did, of course, like usual. "Um," I thought about it, and I finally sort of caught up with the thought that was running my mouth. "Oh, I mean, like, what I was thinking was, like, um, maybe we could, um, you know, like try it on each other, and then we'd um, like, have an idea or something about what it would be like." I was incredibly nervous about this. Sometimes when I find ideas like this one lying around in my head they are like the worst things in the world, but sometimes they like work perfectly, and I couldn't ever quite tell which it was going to be until they came out of my mouth and I watched what people said after that. So this was like a really crucial few seconds, because I really didn't want to mess this up and make Amy upset again. "What?" which wasn't a good sign, but it wasn't a bad one either. So I tried explaining it again, and crossed my fingers where she couldn't see it. Maybe this was what Amy felt like when the aliens talked to her or whatever it was. Her face was like kind of confused, where the tears hadn't completely smeared her makeup all over them. She looked a lot worse than most people did in the movies when they cried. She almost looked as bad as I do. Not quite, of course. "You mean, like you and me?" she asked. "Well, duh, I mean, do you see anyone else in here?" I asked her back, because I was getting a little irritated, because it was like hello, have a clue or two already, and she just wasn't getting it, and I still couldn't tell if this was a good idea or a bad one and she wasn't making the stress any easier. "Well, I mean, I mean," she repeated herself, and then gave up and threw herself back down on the bed, but facing me this time. "I dunno, I mean..." I shrugged and flopped down next to her. "it was just an idea," I told her. "Well, I mean," she still looked confused, "but would you like tell anyone? I mean, like if I did?" "No!" I was not, despite the opinions of every single person who had ever tried to teach me math of any sort, stupid. "God, no, don't be dumb, Amy!" She went into her thinking pose except it was sort of sideways, so I let her think because she could become truly unsociable when she was disturbed when she was in this pose. Maybe it improved her reception or something. Finally she came back to this planet and looked at me and said in this kind of weird high voice, "I guess..." So I guess it was a good idea in the balance of things, at least in her head, but then I realized I had like no idea how to like actually go about it myself, so it was kind of dumb to be thinking about it, wasn't it? It made me laugh, which made her upset, which made her make me tell her what I was laughing at, which made her laugh too. "Well, you read all those books," she pointed out to me, as if I was unaware of what they were about. "Well, um, I think light is better..." She was looking at me when I looked up, and she was really close. "Um. Uh, I guess you wanna try it now or something?" She nodded. We sort of stared at each other for a while. It wasn't at all like those stares you read about or see in a movie, where it's like you know what's going to happen and it's I dunno, like falling off a cliff or something. It was more like, You first No you first sort of thing. Finally Amy sighed, because she had like almost no patience, and jabbed forward and gave me a little tiny peck on the lips. "Oh, brilliant," I told her, which was sort of a non sequitur, I guess, but it sort of captured my feelings of the moment. She laughed, which made me laugh, et cetera. When we got done, Amy said, "Okay, you try it." Now I'm going to admit something here which is like totally embarrassing, but then what in my life isn't except my English classes. I'd practiced on my hand, a lot. There. I'm not so ashamed I won't write it down; I'm just ashamed enough that I won't admit it out loud under torture. So I thought maybe I had an edge on her, and like she had gone first and it had been completely lame, so I knew I could do better and maybe show her up for once. I hoped. So I leaned towards her, and just kind of brushed my lips really slowly over hers. I'd read about it once, and it was supposed to be really cool. It was, even if it was Amy. When I stopped and opened my eyes, the first thing Amy said was, "Why did you have your eyes closed?" "Because you're supposed to, stupid! Duh!" Which of course also meant that she had her eyes open, which felt kind of like she was cheating somehow. "Well, but how can you aim if you don't look?" See what I mean about space alienhood? Only someone from another planet would have said aim. "Well," I said patiently, like I was explaining something to someone from another planet, which like I mentioned was a distinct possibility, "usually you're close enough you can find it by feel." "Like Rob and Sandy when they were holding each other?" I was glad for her sake that we'd gone to watch the two of them, so she had a clue now. I nodded, and then like completely unexpectedly she slid one arm under my neck and her other one she sort of laid across my waist. After a little bit of time and a large amount of confusion, I determined that I was supposed to do the same thing, so I stuck one of mine over her, and then I sort of had no idea what to do with the other one. "Stick it under me," Amy told me, so I did as she explained that she'd seen Rob and Sandy do this once. Luckily Amy was a skinny underdeveloped girl like myself and was therefore not heavy enough to hurt. Hugging her felt nice. "What, my turn?" she asked, so I nodded, so she did the same thing I had done, except a little harder. Or firmer. Or something. She pushed more than I had, so it was like our lips squished more, which sounds gross when I say it like that, but it wasn't at the time. I sneaked a peek, and she had her eyes closed this time. "You peeked!" she accused me when she stopped. "How do you know unless you were peeking yourself! Besides, I had to make sure you're doing it right this time," I told her. She stuck out her tongue and made a rude noise, so I made one back at her, so she made one back at me, and we buzzed at each other for a while, until Amy stopped and said, "It's your turn anyway." So I gave her one last buzz, and then moved my head closer to her, but I stopped when she like tried to pull us together. When she finished, I had actually moved several inches, and we were pretty jammed together. She felt pretty warm, which was nice because the evaporating sweat was beginning to make me kind of cold, which reminded me for an instant about taking a shower, but this was sort of more interesting. Anyway, it was like she had tried to outdo me or something, so I decided I was going to like show her what I could do, because after all I'd done all this research and practice and stuff and this was one time I wasn't going to let her get the Drumstick on this one. Metaphorically speaking, I guess. So after I stopped moving, I wet my lips a little, because I read that dry lips were like gross, and then I planted one on Amy that Rob would have paid money to give to Sandy, I mean, I gave it the works with regards to lip action. I even opened my mouth which I had heard also sort of added to enjoyment, though I didn't stick my tongue in because I thought that was sort of gross, swapping spit, I mean, I'd heard for years about not sharing silverware and plates and cups and cans and blah blah blah and so it was like conditioning. Though the idea was inherently gross all by itself. I did it to her for like this amazingly long time, which sort of showed me that yes you could breathe through your nose and if it was reasonably clear then you wouldn't have any problems breathing, which I had wondered about. Amy was like getting into it too, and you could sort of hear both of us breathing sort of noisily, or at least you could if you were that close which I happened to be, and she was like learning on the job or something, because if I did something then she'd try and copy it a few seconds later. After a while, I ran out of variations, and also ended up like really frustrated about Amy being there while realizing at the same time that if she wasn't there I wouldn't have much to be frustrated about. I know it was a paradox but it was extremely irritating anyway. Plus my leg was going to be even stickier. So when I ran out of stuff to do, I pulled loose. We were both sort of breathing heavy, and she looked kind of amazed, like Gosh gee whiz I didn't know Kelly was this cool at all. Or maybe I'm deluding myself, but that was what it looked like to me. She sort of whispered, "Wow," which sort of made me more confident of what she was thinking, ie that I knew more than her about this one thing. It was sort of a vindicating experience. Once was all I needed. We sort of caught our respective breath, and then Amy leaned close, and I closed my eyes, thinking, Well, this ought to be interesting. And it was, really, because like I said she'd learned on the job so to speak, and she was doing a lot of the same stuff I'd done to her like moving her lips around sort of like she was chewing something with her mouth open except she wasn't chewing, which sounds gross but like a lot of this stuff isn't when you're actually doing it. And she did other things which I guess would make sense if you know what kissing is and won't make any if you don't, so if you're reading this and have no idea, go find somebody to experiment with and then you'll know. I'll wait. What I was kind of startled to find out, though, was that what I thought was Amy squirming around was sort of Amy squirming around but was more like Amy rubbing her legs together, which I mentioned way back I had also found to be an enjoyable pastime. Except I'd never done it where anyone could tell, I hoped. When I figured out what she was doing, I sort of stopped kissing back, which she could tell, which information I also filed away for later use. "What?" she asked. "Um, nothing," I lied, because I didn't want to embarrass her for two reasons, one she was my friend, and two if I did and she stopped then we would have stopped and I was having fun. So to keep her from asking questions, I kissed her back again. Or I would have, except she moved, so I ended up kissing her chin instead, which was immensely surprising because the feel is completely different. But, like I said, I did not want to end up second best to Amy this time, so I acted like that was the plan all along, and sort of dragged my lips up to hers, which was sort of like her second kiss except more. Tilting my head to the side as I did this made it like more enjoyable for me at least, and Amy wasn't complaining. In fact, Amy sort of said something like "Nnnnn," when I did this, which sort of made me think for a second, which I also found it was possible to do when kissing. This whole thing was turning out to be this tremendous learning experience. I mean, this was all very exciting and fun and all, but for that reason I wanted to go do something else in the bathroom all by myself, but at the same time I didn't want to stop either. Amy however came up with one of her solutions and just stuck a leg of hers in between mine, which felt fairly comfortable and at the same time sort of added like a whole new dimension to kissing, especially when it made me say, "Nnnnn," like she had. I guess I didn't have to worry about embarrassing her, except if she tried to embarrass me about funny noises, well, she'd done it first. When she sort of moved her leg in and out, which was a blatant imitation of something I don't think I have to name, do I, it was so much of something that I just sort of jerked back in surprise and just nervous tension. Or maybe reflexes had something to do with it. "Oh God I'm-" she started to freak and like also started to pull her leg out, but I was sort of wishing I'd stayed still, well, I was cursing myself that I hadn't, and so I clamped my legs on hers so she couldn't pull it out, and pushed up against her, which was not such a good idea because it jammed several billion of my hormonally abused nerve endings into several billion of hers, and furthermore my nipples were standing out like I'd never seen them except the time the hot water heater broke and I found out about it in the shower, in January in Cincinatti. Well, I mean, I couldn't see them now, but I knew what that sort of about to pop feeling was, because I remembered it. And they really hurt when you jammed them into something when they were like that and you jammed them into a shower door or your best friend's chest. But I managed to keep from screaming in horrid agony, and kissed her some more, so she wouldn't be able to spazz out loud, at least. And, the more I thought about it, or felt about it would be more accurate, the more I liked feeling her up against me, though I wasn't the least bit cold any more. So I used my arm which was over her back and sort of pulled her closer to me, sort of at the lower end, which caused her leg which was in between mine to sort of slide which caused me to feel extremely good for a few seconds. I might even have said, "Nnnnn," again but I wasn't sure if I really said it or if I was just thinking it really hard. After that, we were like about as close as Siamese twins, and I just was not at all sure what to do next. This was going a little bit weird, I thought, and although I was liking it I had like no idea what was happening, well I mean sort of in a broader sense. Amy said, "My turn?" like she was seriously asking a question, except she wasn't. She leaned the couple of inches left between us, and planted another one on my lips, then another, then another, kind of like a three in one sort of deal. Then instead of a similar number four, she just sort of laid it on, which felt tremendously good, and would also have been tremendously frustrating, except she was also just barely moving her leg around which was not just barely feeling very nice. I mean I liked it a lot even though she wasn't doing much. When she stopped this time, and I opened my eyes, which for some reason was getting harder and harder to do the more we practiced, I guess so I wouldn't follow Amy's bad example or something, anyway she had this sort of look on her face, like she'd just gotten up and run around the block while I wasn't looking and seen something gross too. Really exercised and freaked at the same time. She pulled her leg again, and this time I let it go since I thought maybe she had something else in mind, but when we got untangled, she sat up and made like she was going to leave. "I gotta go," she said, kind of out of breath. I guess maybe it was close contact with her, or maybe it's like pixie dust that gives Amy her powers or something and I had some rub off on me, but I knew that she was mostly lying, because using the facilities was like the last thing on her to do list. Don't ask me how I knew, except perhaps I was having the same sorts of ideas but like had different priorities or something. And it was like so unfair, I mean, here I was, like pouring my heart out right on the covers there in front of her, which is kind of gross if you think about it too literally, but I'd given it the old football try or whatever the coach says to the jocks, and like now she was going to take off and do something that I had never managed to figure out because my stupid body was retarded, it wasn't even my mind and there was nothing I could do because it was like my stupid tiny tits and I couldn't fight it, and before I knew it I was trying to smother myself in a pillow because one I was so depressed and two, I couldn't stand to watch Amy walk out and know what she was going to do what I couldn't. Plus I didn't want Amy to see me cry. Again. But no luck, she must have looked one last time or something, because the next thing I knew, other than the facts that my life was worse than hell and that there was no mercy in God or He would have struck me dead right there or something equivalent, which facts were old hat by this time in my life, Amy was hugging me sort of from behind and I could dimly hear her begging me to tell her what was wrong, and she was sorry and she didn't mean it and similar stuff. It took me a long time before I could drag my face out of the pillow where I was buried except for a little crease I made so I could breathe, although suffocation wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't so nasty. Amy was still there, and she let me go when I started to move. When I could stand to look at her, she looked really upset too, which made me feel worse, and I almost took another dive into polyester oblivion except she grabbed me. "What did I dooo?" she wanted to know. "It's nothing," I told her, trying to get her to go away, except I ruined it by sniffling. She got me a kleenex and made me blow my nose. "Something," she told me, then hugged me again. "Please, Kelly, we're best friends, I don't want you to hate me like everyone else does," which was a complete laugh, she ought to try moving to Texas in the middle of seventh grade and a delayed puberty to generate some social problems, except she already lived in Texas. "I'm sorry, whatever I did-" "You didn't DO anything!" I almost yelled at her. She was so clueless tonight. "It's just..." And then I caught myself, for this was something I really didn't want to explain. "Just what?" she asked, and I didn't tell her, but to save some really useless conversation, I told her eventually. No surprise. I had no secrets from her except the ones she hadn't gotten around to yet. But so nobody will think I am like totally spineless, let me tell you that it took well over twenty minutes, which is about three times more than the usual. I think. "You what?" she asked when I got done telling her. "I don't know how!" I sighed, and told her, "I never got the trick or something." She had this look of utter and complete shock on her face, like the one I had on when I was told we were moving to Hell I mean Texas in March. "You don't know how?" "My God, are you even listening to me?" I asked rhetorically, because right then I was going to have a go at smothering to death in this sort of horrible culmination of my entire life, but she nodded frantically. I'd heard that you could see something in the eyes of crazy people and maybe I looked crazy then or something, but she seemed to catch on that things were not going very well in my psyche right then. "Of course I am, I mean, I thought, I thought," she was talking really fast for some reason, "I thought it was just something you knew!" "Well, I don't," I confessed, and made another move to drown my sorrows in my pillow but she grabbed me again. "Wait, I can show you!" she told me, shaking my arm. "It's okay, I can show you how." So I said the first thing that came to my mouth, which was, "What?" "I'll show you!" she told me, then sort of looked at me in this weird sort of way, like Did I just say what I think I just said? Which was nice to see because I'd had a look like that a while ago. Then she sort of firmed up, and said like she was agreeing with herself, "I can show you, if you want." "Um." God, this was one of those hard questions, like Do you have a driver's license miss? I wanted to know how, really bad, but like I didn't think it was something that should be like taught. But all this was Amy's fault anyway, I mean I would have been perfectly happy watching Fantasia on video but no we had to go prove something we both knew perfectly well was true, I was just bugging her. So it was sort of like Right capitalized that she should be the one to fix it. So like before I had anything like my parents would have wanted me to have in the way of thoughts, like This might be fun so I'd better not do it, I said okay. Well, I sort of had them, but I forced them down. They would have been sort of proud that I had them at all. Amy said that she had to take off her clothes to show me, because she could do it without taking them off but then I couldn't see anything. This was a really disturbing concept, her being naked, but I couldn't figure out anything else, I mean, she was so right this time my parents couldn't have figured out an objection except changing the subject like "Did you do the dishes yet?" So I said okay, and she took All Her Clothes Off. It wasn't the first time, she had a swimming pool and it was just easier to change in her room together, and then there was gym of course, but this was majorly different. For one thing, she got on the bed and told me to come closer so I could watch. I did, and it was kind of weird, looking at her from like up close, I mean I was more than a foot away but before I'd tried not to look too hard when she was naked or I was or what ever. It was a lot like looking at myself in the mirror except it was a better angle and I could see stuff that I couldn't normally. And she wasn't so sickeningly ugly. She laid on her back and propped her head up, and then started playing with her nipples a little bit, which just watching made mine hurt, so I asked, "Do I have to do that?" "It makes it more fun," she said. "But mine hurt so bad when I touch them..." "Just be really REALLY light with them, that's what I used to do," she told me. Now, don't get the idea that she had like monster boobs like Laura, they were about as tall as mine but sort of more spread around or filled out or something. She closed her eyes and started stroking them, pretty lightly, and when i was sure she wasn't watching, I started to do the same thing. She was right, again. If I went really light it felt okay. Except after a little while it felt more than okay. "You watching?" Amy asked, and I opened my eyes, and she was smiling at me but not like she was going to laugh at me, more like she was happy for me, which kind of agreed with what she said because she said, "Yeah, like that. Gently." She kept one hand playing with her nipple, but the other one she sort of slid down her stomach, dragging her nails along like she was scratching herself lightly. When she got into her pubic hair, she sort of stopped and started rubbing the whole thing, which I already knew didn't do it. "Try that," she told me without looking. I was like really embarrassed by the idea, but I mean she was doing it first AND she was completely nude, so I pulled off my shirt and did what she had done. My fingernails even though they were all crappy, kind of left like tingles which floated loose and around my body for a while when I did it. When I got to my pubic hair and started to rub, gently, like she said, it was nice, but not quite nice enough. I was going to complain but I figured she knew what she was doing. She rubbed for a while, and so did I, and then she put a couple of fingers in between her legs and rubbed them around the loose skin which I vaguely recall was the labia or something like that. So I did the same thing, on me not her of course, and it was nice, too. Almost nicer. Amy just kept rubbing back and forth, and so I did too, and it got nicer the longer I did it. Eventually it got so nice that I had to lie down myself, so I grabbed a pillow so I could watch what was going on, and laid down like so my head was near her feet and vice versa. She kind of smiled at me as I did all this, but she didn't stop rubbing, though I had to. She waited for me, though, and I got sort of back to where I was before. Amy was starting to smell a little, and when I looked I knew why, because there was a little clear stuff leaking out, and I knew what that was, but she did something that I never would have in like twenty lifetimes, she stuck her finger in it and then like licked her finger. When she did that, she sort of groaned, and then looked at me I guess to make sure I was doing it too, which I wasn't. "Come on," she told me, "it's not that bad. Ask Rob," she giggled, and then stuck her hand back where it was and started to rub again. I guess she was right in a way, I mean, it wasn't poisonous or anything, but I still hesitated, but then I figured, well this wasn't the first time I heard about this, and maybe it was part of what I was missing, so I rubbed my finger in it and then brought it up to my face. It smelled like it always did when I cleaned myself off. It tasted... weird. And not like fish, like the guys always said it did. Of course, it didn't smell like that either. Just the idea was gross, but when I stuck my tongue out and licked my finger, it was like I'd been shocked. It was a certain kind of shock, and it sort of centered between my legs, so I put my hand back there and rubbed some more. It felt better than it had before. Amy was getting cramps or something from laying there that long, because she was like moving around, but not much, and she kept her hand going like a trooper, as they say. So I did too. But I kept watching, so when she stuck her finger inside, I saw that. She was sort of moving it around, but I couldn't see what exactly she was doing, so I tried to imitate it the best I could. I guess I was, because I slowly figured out that Amy wasn't having cramps, it was sort of like music, you just sort of had to move to it. I tried really hard to not kick her in the head. We sort of went on for a while, and I started to think of Rob, Sandy's boyfriend, because he was a lot better to think about than any of the guys at school, and that sort of kept me busy for a long time. I got distracted when Amy started to moan, and then I gave up completely when she said something which would get me grounded if I repeated it and yanked off the bed, a lot like Sandy had, and then thrashed around a while like Sandy had, and I hoped she wasn't going to cry like Sandy had because I was going to. Because once again, I missed the boat. "Kelly! Kellykellykelly, wait!" she said as she jumped off the bed and chased me down before I could make it out my bedroom door. I was having vague ideas about throwing myself under a truck or something. "Wait, I'll help, I promise! Wait, come here," and she led me back to the bed, and handed me a kleenex because I was crying again, and then she pulled the covers up and wrapped them around me like a little kid in a blanket and I was so upset I didn't even care that I was going to get everything slimy. When I finally couldn't cry any more, she put her face right in front of mine, and told me, "I said I'd teach you how, it's okay, just lie backwards, okay?" She pushed me as she was talking, so it wasn't like I had a choice so I laid down. When she put her hand in MY crotch, though, I sat right back up. "What-!" I started to scream at her as I yanked her hand out. "Look, it's like the Yellow Pages, right, my fingers know how to do the walking, so just lie down and I'll show you what to do." "But-" and she stuck her hand down there again and I yanked myself about a foot up the bed. "Stop!" "Kellyyyyy," she said, like she was sad. "It's okay, I promise." "But, but, I mean, I, but can't you just show me or something?" She sighed. "It'd be easier if I just showed you. Come on." She talked me into it, sort of, but I couldn't keep from trying to pull her hands out, it was like she was tickling me at the same time. Finally she sat back, and gave me this really dirty look followed by this look that if you knew Amy you would run away when you saw it, but she just told me to lay on my stomach and we'd try it that way. So I rolled over, and then she put her hand between my legs and started to stroke things, and before I knew it I was trying to make her stop again because it TICKLED, but then she put her hand back and a few seconds later I tried to pull her hand out except this time her other hand was holding one of her socks and she grabbed one wrist and the other and then my hands were tied. I said, "What the-" and I was going to say a lot of other things I learned back in Cincinatti from a friend of mine who had this really amazing vocabulary but she interrupted. "Wait, roll back over, this'll keep your hands out of the way." I looked at her sort of behind my shoulder, and she had this It's Not What It Looks Like Really expression on her face. "Really, it's okay, I'm not gonna leave you or anything, it's just so you won't keep stopping me." I thought about it so hard I'm surprised my hair didn't cook, but there wasn't like a whole lot I could do about it except maybe start screaming that I was about to be kidnapped by space aliens and wake my parents up, and they'd ask so many stupid questions that I'd rather be taken to Arcturus or wherever. So I rolled over. Instead of laughing at me or doing something evil like spraying shaving cream in my face which was what had happened the last time I got tied up, she made me roll BACK over so she could put some pillows down for me and then made me roll back over AGAIN on the pillows. I was a little confused myself by then, but I was on my back and Amy was sitting next to me and smiling as I waited for everything to stop spinning. She stroked my front, like around my stomach, and it felt almost like being tickled, except there was something else there which kept me from trying to kick her in the face. Sort of like she was drawing lines in my nervous system or something. She did that for a few strokes, then put her whole hand on me, and just let it sit there for a little while and be warm. Then she started rubbing me lightly, using both hands. It felt really nice, like a good back rub from a friend, except of course it wasn't my back, but it felt really nice and warm and relaxing. She did that for a while, moving all around, and then sort of moved up my body to the pain zone on my chest. I got all tense again, because I swear all someone has to do is think at my chest and my hibouncers start to hurt, but she put a finger on each nipple so light I could barely tell they were there. When she started to rub, I jerked, but it wasn't because it felt ticklish or because it hurt. It sent some kind of signal downstairs saying, Hey this is major good stuff! "See?" she said. "I told you this would work." I put aside Amy being right yet again, because I had done better in the kissing thing, which thought must have triggered Amy's telepathy because she stopped rubbing and leaned close and kissed me on the lips. It was kind of light, but that was good right then. Then she moved down and kissed each of my nipples, which felt really nice, and then she licked at one, which hurt like hell so I told her not to do that any more in one nasty word. She didn't, she put her fingers back up there and they were like feathers except not ticklish at all, just very very light and nice. When I guess she figured I was ready, she moved off my breasts and down my sides, which was extremely stimulating but since it was both sides at once I had no idea which way to jump so I just sat there and tried to breathe again. Amy gave me this grin, like See? and rubbed my thighs really firmly like I was having cramps except I never got cramps on the outsides of my hips. She was moving her hands in circles, and the circles started moving towards each other, which felt better and better the more she did it. I realized about then that I wasn't going to catch my breath for a long time, so I gave up trying to be nice and quiet and just sat back and tried to get enough. I also tried to move some way or another, but like with everything else with this, I didn't know which way to go so after a few seconds I stopped because I didn't have any idea and Amy did. After what seemed like a long time, she touched my pubic hair with both hands at the same time, then she put her hands in between my legs and sort of pulled them apart so I was sort of spread out in this really revealing position which I figured I was going to be embarrassed about some time in the future. But not now, it felt too good. Amy moved so she was sitting in between my legs, so I couldn't close them I guess, and she started rubbing my thighs again, which felt as good as it had before. Like last time, she started circles that moved closer and closer, and before I really knew it I caught myself making a really embarrassing but heartfelt noise that I don't really know how to spell. Instead of making fun of me or giggling, Amy just said, "See? Isn't that nice?" and I would have told her yes except she didn't stop so instead of saying Uh-huh I said something like Yuh-nuh-uh-mmmm. She snorted then, but I guess it was funny if you weren't having it done to you, and she didn't stop or anything either. Finally, instead of making circles, what she did was put her palms on either side and put her thumbs out, and started rubbing me directly. THAT felt so good right then that I think I tried to slam her hands as hard against me as I could. She pulled with me, though, and kept rubbing with her thumbs. This all felt so good I could barely stand it, and I hoped Amy wasn't upset because just like earlier I sort of had to dance to my body music except now instead of like a waltz it was like thrash metal and I couldn't stop moving. I guess that was why she moved and then like pinned my legs down with her arms. It felt better, sort of like giving me something to push against, so I did. She moved all around, and it didn't hurt like it usually did, and I sort of dimly wondered why in what was left of my brain until I figured it out, and I would have smacked myself a lot if my hands weren't at the moment under my back and tied together. All that clear stuff! It was really slick, and she'd probably put it all over her thumbs or fingers or whatever she was using and that's why it didn't hurt like it did when I did it because, well, that was something I'd never thought of doing. I thought it was gross but at this point gross was pretty darn exciting and when I thought of her fingers and me all over them I said a few other things I didn't even know what they were at the time and pushed even harder against her. She pushed back, and it was a good thing because I was really starting to thrash around, except she was holding me down, or I might have fallen off the bed. I could feel SOMEthing building up, and I kind of had a good idea what it was, but it was all new to me anyway, and Amy just would not stop... Then it was like where Bugs Bunny lights a fuse on a stick of dynamite, and you know it's going to explode, just not when, but you know it's coming; that's how I felt, except it was like Amy had lit ME and I was gonna blow up in some short I hoped amount of time, because it was like the most intense thing in the world, and I only managed to keep from screaming by biting myself in the lip, and even that felt good... I guess it was a little after that that It Happened, because everything went really hazy bright like a flashlight in the eyes, and I went off, I guess. I sort of recall I lifted myself off the bed entirely, and I don't think I screamed because I was biting my lip so hard but I was probably moaning a lot, and it went on and on like waves at the beach just over and over... Now I Got It, and I could understand what all the fuss was about. When it ended, I was kind of sore, and then I hurt a lot in like several different places. "See?" Amy said, and I would have said something back except my lip was bleeding, so I just nodded. Then she saw something like blood on my lip or something because she helped me sit up, which I didn't think I could do because I didn't think I had bones any more, and then she got me a kleenex and stuck it on my lip where I could mouth it in place, like a horse or something, while she untied my hands, which hurt too. I think she tied the sock too tight. Or maybe I was pulling on it too hard. Anyway, when I got free, I grabbed the kleenex with one hand and Amy with the other, and I just hugged her as hard as I could, because I knew how hard it was for her, and it had felt so good, and it was like my first time and she was the one that showed me and all sorts of other stuff which is why I hugged her so long. She hugged me back until we stopped, and then she gave me a little kiss on the cheek, like she does sometimes. Right then, I didn't want anything but sleep, but Amy reminded me that sleeping with makeup on is like a really bad idea, so we went to go wash it off in the bathroom. I was almost scared to find out how late it was - almost half past one - because I hadn't realized how long it took or something. One weird thing was, we like held hands going to the bathroom to clean up, and it felt like really good and right, even though this was more like boyfriend sort of privileges. But I guess it was okay, like when you were little and held the teacher's hand, and Amy had taught me a whole lot tonight, and besides, she grabbed my hand not the other way around. And I felt so nice to her right then that she could have done almost anything and I would have said Okay. We were all sweaty and stuff, so when Amy suggested a shower, I said okay, and like I mentioned I was even going to let her go first, but then she said no, that it was more fun with two. I thought that maybe she would show me something else, but I guess all she wanted to do was shower, because she got soap and washcloths and stuff and when we got under the water I felt like really clean for the first time in at least a year or so, I mean the stuff in the bedroom was fun but I never did like being sticky, and with Amy there she could really scrub my back, which I thought might help cut down on the back zit problem. But I scrubbed hers first, because like I said I kind of owed her. I almost fell getting out of the shower because I was like so exhausted, and I think my legs were beginning to twitch like the time I tried to run a mini marathon or like Sandy's were, and I thought that that was why until I remembered she'd been epilepsing first and this was after, for me. Amy helped me into a towel and back to the room and into the bed which wasn't grossed out like I was scared it would be, and she got me dressed like a little kid and then she climbed in next to me and that was the last thing I remember except she kissed me on the lips like Mom used to do sometimes when I was little and she was nice, a long time ago. I have to put down what happened the next day when we woke up, except it's really late now and I have to get up tomorrow to go to church. I don't know how they could find a church right in the middle of Hell I mean Texas, it seems like it has to be a trick somehow, and you'd think that my parents would listen to something like me saying It's a trap of the Devil and we shouldn't go. That's an important statement that one shouldn't ignore offhandedly. But listening to me is like the last thing on their to do list, right behind leaving here and going to someplace decent, and way under things like building a ladder to the moon so they can get fresh cheese. And I am like completely exhausted, again, by now, so I guess I'll finish the story later. - -30- "They always said, 'Write about what you know.' Well, I've got enough teenage angst experiences to write volumes..." - ehayes "Tallyho!" \ / @>--,--'-- ehayes@nym.alias.net + vicki .sig Ellen Hayes --=(*)=(*)=-- Renaissance Woman ==[-------- + virus 9.1a http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/Heights/5734/ -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE----- Version: 2.6.2 iQCVAwUBNJ+2s3YDebnvyV1VAQHlvQP+IzveTX5aw7R4mvpPm3FZEUmHS9iXA3G6 giSB9vW2EKnKtTtTeVVxepzHXuzol/t0HVasLKg/UWQQnWzVk2j5uFriuwDML3gY OfQViSgm/eOoEeNs2BBGXm7xaPoNt8pHkAUVZsnai4BgDOIRW+PQCQA0k6RwWxm2 f24XT+zqktk= =eEMk -----END PGP SIGNATURE----- -- +--------------' Story submission `-+-' Moderator contact `------------+ | story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us | story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us | | Archive site +--------------------+------------------+ Newsgroup FAQ |